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You have been working with your company for two years and are interested in a promotion. Write a letter to your direct boss. In your letter: Explain your varied achievements over the past two years Express your interest in growing with the company Ask for a meeting to discuss a potential promotion

You have been working with your company for two years and are interested in a promotion. Write a letter to your direct boss. In your letter: Explain your varied achievements over the past two years Express your interest in growing with the company Ask for a meeting to discuss a potential promotion PVWWg
Dear Mr. Smith, I am employee of your company's sales department with ID holder number DXB2689. I am writing this letter to bring in your kind attention about my promotion. While working as a junior sale promoter I have successfully completed two years in this company. I have achieved all monthly targets which had been given by my seniors. Besides, company's products are highly demanded in the market due to my best strategy of promoting them. Because of my this performance the management selected me as the best employee of the month in previous year. I am extremely keen to work with hard efforts and trying to promote company's product in international market as well. I made perfect contribution to increase company's annual profit. Therefore, I am looking forward for my promotion at senior designation based on my abilities. I would like to request you to arrange a meeting with me at your convenient time to discuss my performance. This could help you to decide that on which position you may nominate me in your company. I would appreciate your immediate attention to this matter. Yours sincerely, David Zane
Dear Mr. Smith,

I am employee of your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company's
sales department with ID holder number DXB2689. I am writing this letter to bring in your kind attention about my promotion.

“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
working as a junior sale promoter I have
successfully
completed two years in this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
. I have achieved all monthly targets which had been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
by my seniors.
Besides
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company's
products are
highly
demanded in the market due to my best strategy of promoting them.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
of my this performance the management selected me as the best employee of the month in previous year.

I am
extremely
keen to work with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
efforts and trying to promote
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company's
product in international market
as well
. I made perfect contribution to increase
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company's
annual profit.
Therefore
, I am looking forward for my promotion at senior designation based on my abilities.

I would like to request you to arrange a meeting with me at your convenient time to discuss my performance. This could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
you to decide that on which position you may nominate me in your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
.

I would appreciate your immediate attention to this matter.

Yours
sincerely
, David Zane
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IELTS letter You have been working with your company for two years and are interested in a promotion. Write a letter to your direct boss. In your letter: Explain your varied achievements over the past two years Express your interest in growing with the company Ask for a meeting to discuss a potential promotion

Letter
  American English
7 paragraphs
188 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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