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You bought a music concert ticket. However, you are unable to go. So you want to offer the ticket to your friend. v.1

You bought a music concert ticket. However, you are unable to go. So you want to offer the ticket to your friend. v. 1
Dear Eric, Hope you are doing great. It's been only two weeks since I last saw you and it already feels like a year! I am writing to offer you a concert ticket that I purchased a few days ago. As I can't make it to the concert, I thought you should go. On November 7th, Guns N' Roses is coming to Oakland to rock the city. The full team would be on the stage and it would be a 4 hours' blast at the Oakland Coliseum. I did not want to miss my favourite band's live performance and purchased a ticket. Unfortunately, I will have to cancel it due to a sudden family tour to Canada during the time to meet my grandparents on their 50th wedding anniversary. I know how much you revere Guns N' Roses and that's why I would like you to enjoy the concert. I did not want to disappoint my parents and dishearten my grandmother, who is eagerly expecting me on their marriage anniversary. I will give the ticket to David, who is also going to the concert, and you can meet him prior to the concert to collect it. Do not forget to record the performance and share your experience with me when I get back and meet you. Take care and have fun. Warm regards, Robert
Dear Eric,

Hope you are doing great. It's been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
two weeks since I last
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
you and it already feels like a year! I am writing to offer you a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
concert
ticket that I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchased
a few days ago. As I can't
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
concert
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
you should go.

On November 7th, Guns N' Roses is coming to Oakland to rock the city. The full team would be on the stage and it would be a 4 hours' blast at the Oakland Coliseum. I did not want to miss my
Possible spelling mistake. 'favourite' is British English.
favourite
band's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
performance and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchased
a ticket. Unfortunately, I will
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
cancel it due to a sudden family tour to Canada during the time to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
my grandparents on their 50th wedding anniversary.

I know how much you revere Guns N' Roses and that's why I would like you to enjoy the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
concert
. I did not want to disappoint my parents and dishearten my grandmother, who is
eagerly
expecting me on their
Wedding anniversaries are the proper term to describe the anniversary of the day of a wedding.
marriage
anniversary.

Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
will give the ticket to David, who is
also
going to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
concert
, and you can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
him prior to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
concert
to collect it. Do not forget to record the performance and share your experience with me when I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
back and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
you.

Take care and have fun.

Warm regards,

Robert
1Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
We should learn languages because language is the only thing worth knowing even poorly.
Kató Lomb

IELTS letter You bought a music concert ticket. However, you are unable to go. So you want to offer the ticket to your friend. v. 1

Letter
  American English
8 paragraphs
223 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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