Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Writing a letter to a friend to find a part time job offer

Writing a letter to a friend to find a part time job offer j92pX
Hi Sam, Hope you’re doing great my friend. I’m planing to come to the Toronto by next month, and I might need your help to find out good part time opportunity I was selected to western university for a MBA program. That take 2 years to completeWhile I’m stay and study I was planing to attend some kind of part time work. Since it can be helpful to fulfill my daily expenses as well as can be a better way to experience the community. And to be honest I found the living expenses is much higher in the downtown comparatively other places. So having some kind of alternative income will really helpful. Since you’re living in Toronto for such a long period of time I thought I might get help to find you to get recommendation and help to find out part time job. I’m more into work in restaurant, coffee shops or Walmart since I heard that are the easiest places that student get part time offers Hope to see you soon and will ring you once I arrived to the airportCheersJane
Hi Sam, Hope you’re doing great my friend. I’m planing to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to the Toronto by
next
month, and I might need your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to find out
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
part
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
opportunity I
was selected
to western university for
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
MBA program. That take 2 years to
Possible spelling mistake found.
completeWhile
I’m
Consider using a past participle here: "staid", "stayed".
stay
and study I was planing to attend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
kind of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
part
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
work. Since it can be helpful to fulfill my daily expenses
as well
as can be a better way to experience the community. And to be honest I found the living expenses is much higher in the downtown
comparatively
other places.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
having
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
kind of alternative income will
really
helpful. Since you’re living in Toronto for such a long period of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
I might
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to find you to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
recommendation and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to find out
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
part
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
job. I’m more into work in restaurant, coffee shops or Walmart since I heard that are the easiest places that student
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
part
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
offers Hope to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
and will ring you once I arrived to the
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
airportCheersJane
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS letter Writing a letter to a friend to find a part time job offer

Letter
  American English
1 paragraphs
182 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts
  • 6band
    traveling to another country to work for 6 months
    Dear Sam, I am writing about working in your head office in Canada. This step may influence my career, and I can continue my current work remotely. I would appreciate your arrangement. It can’t be neglected that taking new right decisions may help in developing my profession. Your head office is n...
  • 6band
    You are working in a school. Write a letter to the Principal to recommend your friend for the position of sports teacher in your school.
    Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing to let you know about a sport teacher since this position in our school is now vacant. Also, we need an experienced and skilled teacher currently. For your kind information, she is my classmate as well as my cousin. So I know her very well. She is very serious about ...
  • 5.5band
    the rules of an online class
    Hello everyone, my name is phuong. Today I wwill talk about Today I will talk about a very interesting and close topic with student nowadays: the rules of an online class As you know, With the complex situation of the current Covid-19 epidemic, everyone's ordinary activities are affected and have a...
  • 5band
    write email to principal for week off during a course
    Dear Principal, Now, I am currently taking a course at a college. The course is English speaking with teacher Mai, the time is 13pm to 15pm. However, I need a week off during this course. Just a moment ago, My mother just sent messages to me. The messages tell about my bird is sick and look should...
  • 6band
    Requesting the accommodation officer to change the room because of the roommate
    Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing this letter to let you know that I am not fully satisfied with my current living conditions. While the accommodation facilities are fine, my roommate is doing intolerable things and making it almost impossible for me to work. I hope you will consider my situation and...
  • 5band
    write a letter to your friend and ask some advice
    I’ve got a problem and I need your advice. Next month I have a week’s vacation with my group of close friends. We are going to go camping and have some picnic in resort and I really want to go with them. However, I also have an exam in Korean. And the problem is my parents refuses to let me go. They...