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Write a letter to the newspaper to enter the competition

Write a letter to the newspaper to enter the competition R0W8Q
5-30 th crescent Warren park 1KambuzumaHarareDear sir/ madam It’s a pleasure to be writing the letter in response to the advertisement of a holiday competition. I would like to take part in the competition. If l get the chance to win the competition, l would like to go France with my parents. That will be the best present to me to them as they experience the beautiful cities in France like Paris and others. I have dreamt of going to desneny world when l was little just want to feel that experience. I hope you will consider me as one of the winners. It will be my great honour to be in the competition. Yours sincerely Gain jim
5-30
Possible spelling mistake found.
th
crescent Warren park 1KambuzumaHarareDear sir/ madam It’s a pleasure to be writing the letter in response to the
The usual collocation for "advertisement" is "for" not "of". Did you mean "advertisement for"?
advertisement of
a holiday competition. I would like to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
take part
in the competition.

If l
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the chance to win the competition, l would like to go France with my parents. That will be the best present to me to them as they experience the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
cities in France like Paris
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
and others
. I have dreamt of going to
Possible spelling mistake found.
desneny
world when l was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
want to feel that experience.

I hope you will consider me as one of the winners. It will be my great
Possible spelling mistake. 'honour' is British English.
honour
to be in the competition.

Yours
sincerely
Gain
Possible spelling mistake found.
jim
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IELTS letter Write a letter to the newspaper to enter the competition

Letter
  American English
4 paragraphs
116 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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