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Asking your company to take few days off

Asking your company to take few days off xxP69
Dear Joseph, I'm reaching out to you to get your permission to take few days off next week. My mother recently had issues with her neighbours becuase of our dog Peanut and she was searching for a new apartment. Luckily she found a great place last week and she signed a contract. Everything happened very quickly and now she has to move in as soon as possible and she does not have anyone to help her. I would like to take off two days only, Thursday and Friday. Considering also the weekend, I believe we will have enough time to finalize necessary paperwork and move out. I will be outside of the city and the area where my mother lives do not have internet access. But you can reach out to me through mobile in case of emergency. I know we are in planning period and apologies for the last minute request, but I will be working 2 hours extra everyday next week to make up for these days. I would be happy to work over the weekend as well if needed. Thanks for your understanding. Yours sincerely, Beyza
Dear Joseph,

I'm reaching out to you to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
your permission to take few days off
next
week.

My mother recently had issues with her
Possible spelling mistake. 'neighbours' is British English.
neighbours
Possible spelling mistake found.
becuase
of our dog
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
Peanut and
she was searching for a new apartment. Luckily she found a great place last
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
week and
she signed a contract. Everything happened
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
quickly
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
she
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
in as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
as
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
possible and
she does not have anyone to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
her.

I would like to take off two days
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
, Thursday and Friday. Considering
also
the weekend, I believe we will have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
time to finalize necessary paperwork and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
out. I will be
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "outside".
outside of
the city and the area where my mother
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
do not have internet access.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
you can reach out to me through mobile in case of emergency.

I know we are in planning period and apologies for the last minute request,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I will be working 2 hours extra everyday
next
week to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
up for these days. I would be happy to work over the weekend
as well
if needed. Thanks for your understanding.

Yours
sincerely
,

Possible spelling mistake found.
Beyza
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IELTS letter Asking your company to take few days off

Letter
  American English
7 paragraphs
188 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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