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Write a letter to the manager of the museum , why you visited the museum,Describe the problems you faced, suggest what can be done to avoid these problems.

Write a letter to the manager of the museum, why you visited the museum, Describe the problems you faced, suggest what can be done to avoid these problems. JlyN5
Dear sir, My name is Priyanka Chauhan. I visited to your museum last week with my kit and kin. The reason behind my visit is that I am very fond of watching various historical artefacts, statues and so on. Moreover, I have deep interest to know various important information about the past. My grandfather was a freedom fighter and he told me various things about his struggle in the freedom. Anyway, everything was great at your Museum, my father faced many problems in moving around you are museum as he has injury in his one leg and he found it difficult to move from one place to another. Apart from this, there was a problem of cleanliness as there was a dust all over the place. I strongly think that you should rectify both the problems as earlier as possible. In order to resolve this issue, you can provide a wheelchair which will be beneficial for the older people as well as pay more attention towards tidiness. Yours faithfully, Priyanka Chauhan
Dear sir,

My name is Priyanka Chauhan. I visited to your museum last week with my kit and kin. The reason behind my visit is that I am
very
fond of watching various historical
artefacts
, statues and
so
on.
Moreover
, I have deep interest to know various
important
information about the past. My grandfather was a freedom
fighter and
he
told
me various things about his struggle in the freedom.

Anyway, everything was great at your Museum, my father faced
many
problems in moving around you are museum as he has injury in his one
leg and
he found it difficult to
move
from one place to another. Apart from this, there was a problem of cleanliness as there was a dust all over the place.

I
strongly
think
that you should rectify both the problems as
earlier
as
possible. In order to resolve this issue, you can provide a wheelchair which will be beneficial for the older
people
as well
as pay more attention towards tidiness.

Yours
faithfully
, Priyanka Chauhan
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IELTS letter Write a letter to the manager of the museum, why you visited the museum, Describe the problems you faced, suggest what can be done to avoid these problems.

Letter
  American English
5 paragraphs
170 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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