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Write a letter to a friend to ask to take care of you children while you are away for a business trip . Tell Him/her What Food do they love to eat What activities they like to do What arrangements you have made to pick them.

Dear John, I hope this letter finds you in good health and best of spirit. I need an favor and I find you are best person in whom I can totally rely on. As you know our startup company is on the verge of expanding their business in the western country by launching plethora of products and to persuade investors have to urgently leave for newyork this Sunday. Will you please take care of my two children for next 5 days. Let me tell you about their food preferences both of them love to eat vegetarian food and you will find all the Grocery items stacked up In the shelves so that you don’t have to run to the supermarket. However Kevin allergic to wheat products So please consider these factors when you give them food. Michael like to play football and outdoor games during evenings, where Kevin love to play video games. Also they prefer going to park to catch-up with their friends, If you are free would please won’t mind taking them to park. I will be back on Sunday afternoon and will pick up both the kids from you house. And later that evening I have planned and Dinner for us at the Monel restaurant. I would be appreciate for your help! Your truly, Manjeet Mankani
Dear John,

I hope this letter finds you in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
health and best of spirit. I need
Use "a" instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
an
favor and I find you
A determiner is probably missing here: "are the best".
are best
person in whom I can
totally
rely on. As you know our startup
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
is on the verge of expanding their business in the western country by launching plethora of products and to persuade investors
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
urgently
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
for
Possible spelling mistake found.
newyork
this Sunday. Will you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
please
take care of my two children for
next
5 days.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Let
me
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
you about their food preferences both of them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
to eat vegetarian food and you will find all the Grocery items stacked up In the shelves
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that you don’t
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
run to the supermarket.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
Kevin allergic to wheat products
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
please
consider these factors when you give them food.

Michael like to play football and outdoor games during evenings, where Kevin
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
to play video games.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
they prefer going to park to catch-up with their friends, If you are free would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
please
won’t mind taking them to park.

I will be back on Sunday afternoon and will pick up both the kids from you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
. And later that evening I have planned and Dinner for us at the
Possible spelling mistake found.
Monel
restaurant.

I would be
Consider using the past participle "appreciated"?
appreciate
for your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
!

Your
truly
,

Possible spelling mistake found.
Manjeet
Possible spelling mistake found.
Mankani

IELTS letter Write a letter to a friend to ask to take care of you children while you are away for a business trip. Tell Him/her What Food do they love to eat What activities they like to do What arrangements you have made to pick them.

Letter
  American English
8 paragraphs
218 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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