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The office you work in does not have any cafeteria for staff. Write a letter to your manager to request setting up a cafeteria for the staff. In your letter, you should tell, what you heard about the inconvenience from the staff how you feel about it what suggestions you have about setting up a cafeteria

Dear Sir or Madam, Hope I did not catch you at a busy time since I am sure that you have many other important priorities at work to take care of. But, the issue, I want to raise here, is also equally important for our office staff. The reason for which I am writing this letter is that our office does not have any cafeteria for its staff where they can go and sit to enjoy some snacks, drinks and food. Now, this would not really be much of an issue if they did not have to walk about 10-12 minutes to grab something for them when they need something to eat or drink during their short breaks and thus collectively waste many important work hours. Besides, going out like this just to get some snacks or get a cup of coffee is rather inconvenient for us, especially, when the weather condition is not favourable. Therefore, I would like to request you to set up a staff cafeteria in the large empty room at the corner of our office, which remains unused most of the time. That will make sure that our staff have at least one less issue to worry about when trying to be more productive and efficient at work. I hope you will consider the issue and arrange to set up a cafeteria soon. Thank you in advance. Yours faithfully, Andrew Jones
Dear Sir or Madam,

Hope I did not catch you at a busy time since I am sure that you have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
other
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
priorities at work to take care of.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
, I want to raise here, is
also
equally
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for our office staff.

The reason for which I am writing this letter is that our office does not have any cafeteria for its staff where they can go and sit to enjoy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
snacks, drinks and food.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Now
, this would not
really
be much of an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
if they did not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
walk about 10-12 minutes to grab something for them when they need something to eat or drink during their short breaks and
thus
collectively
waste
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
work hours.
Besides
, going out like this
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
snacks or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a cup of coffee is
rather
inconvenient for us,
especially
, when the weather condition is not
Possible spelling mistake. 'favourable' is British English.
favourable
.

Therefore
, I would like to request you to set up a staff cafeteria in the large empty room at the corner of our office, which remains unused most of the time. That will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
sure that our staff have at least one less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
to worry about when trying to be more productive and efficient at work.

I hope you will consider the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
and arrange to set up a cafeteria
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
. Thank you in advance.

Yours
faithfully
,

Andrew Jones

IELTS letter The office you work in does not have any cafeteria for staff. Write a letter to your manager to request setting up a cafeteria for the staff. In your letter, you should tell, what you heard about the inconvenience from the staff how you feel about it what suggestions you have about setting up a cafeteria

Letter
  American English
7 paragraphs
234 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
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  • The office you work in does not have any cafeteria for staff. Write a letter to your manager to request setting up a cafeteria for the staff. In your letter, you should tell, what you heard about the inconvenience from the staff how you feel about it what suggestions you have about setting up a cafeteria