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The office you work in does not have any cafeteria for staff. Write a letter to your manager to request setting up a cafeteria for the staff. In your letter, you should tell, what you heard about the inconvenience from the staff how you feel about it what suggestions you have about setting up a cafeteria

Dear Mr. Jameson, I am writing this email to you to request that if you can set up a cafeteria for our office staff. To be more specific, the staff is facing so many dicfficulties while taking breaks such as there is no place to relax and we have to go out to eat snacks and lunch. Due to these our alloted break time not enough and our work hours get affected. I personally believe that the cafeteria is one of the necessary facilities our office must have in the building. Sometimes, when weather conditions are not favourable some of us miss our eating lunch which is an alarming situation. In addition to it, I think not having lunch room is affecting everyone’s overall performance as employees of this company. I would like to suggest that you should convert the big room in the corner of 4th floor into the cafeteria for us. I hope you will look into this matter as it is causing a lot of discomfort to all of us. Thank you in advance. Yours Faithfully, Veerpal Kaur
Dear Mr. Jameson,

I am writing this email to you to request that if you can set up a cafeteria for our office staff. To be more specific, the staff is facing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
Possible spelling mistake found.
dicfficulties
while taking breaks such as there is no place to
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
relax and
we
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
go out to eat snacks and lunch. Due to
A determiner cannot combine with a possessive pronoun. Did you mean simply "our alloted" or "these alloted"?
these our alloted
break time not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
and our work hours
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
.

I
personally
believe that the cafeteria is one of the necessary facilities our office
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
have in the building.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Sometimes
, when weather conditions are not
Possible spelling mistake. 'favourable' is British English.
favourable
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of us miss our eating lunch which is an alarming situation.
In addition
to it, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
not having lunch room is affecting everyone’s
overall
performance as employees of this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
.

I would like to suggest that you should convert the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
room in the corner of 4th floor into the cafeteria for us. I hope you will look into this matter as it is causing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
discomfort to all of us.

Thank you in advance.

Yours
Faithfully
,

Possible spelling mistake found.
Veerpal
Possible spelling mistake found.
Kaur
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IELTS letter The office you work in does not have any cafeteria for staff. Write a letter to your manager to request setting up a cafeteria for the staff. In your letter, you should tell, what you heard about the inconvenience from the staff how you feel about it what suggestions you have about setting up a cafeteria

Letter
  American English
7 paragraphs
180 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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