Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

The following appeared in a letter to the editor of a local newspaper."Too much emphasis is placed on the development of reading skills in elementary school. Many students who are discouraged by the lonely activity of reading turn away from schoolwork mer

The following appeared in a letter to the editor of a local newspaper. " Too much emphasis is placed on the development of reading skills in elementary school. Many students who are discouraged by the lonely activity of reading turn away from schoolwork mer n6ewe
In this editorial the author concludes that hearing books on tape would encourage the students to read books and learn more eagerly. To justify this conclusion he points out that books recorded on audiocassette tape can be an important alternative for students who are tired of the only reading activity. He also cites that many studies have emphasized on allowing students to hear books read aloud. A careful scrutiny to the evidence reveals that it lends little credence to this argument. First, the author unfairly assumes that the students discouraged by lonely reading activity will show enthusiasm towards hearing the audio versions. They might be displeased by hearing too since they are not interested in the subjects and contents of the books, or they might seem eager at first but lose their attention and desire in long term. Without considering and ruling out these and other possibilities the author cannot substantially conclude that the audio versions would be highly beneficial. Second, even assuming that the students remain enthusiastic in long term it does not guarantee their eager and progress in learning. Their eagerness might be merely because of considering the activity of hearing as an entertainment rather that learning their lessons and they may pay no deep attention to the content of the audio books. Therefore the author conclusion about the students’ more eager learning would be specious. Third, the author provides no evidence that the results of the studies are statistically reliable. In order to achieve a strong conclusion, the studies’ sample must be sufficient in size and representative of the overall population of the student discouraged by merely reading. Lacking evidence of a sufficiently representative sample the author cannot justifiably rely on the studies to draw any conclusion. In sum, the author fails to convince me. To bolster this conclusion, he must account for other possible factors in discouraging the students and provide information about their long term reading and learning improvements after being exposed to hearing the audio books. To better assess the strength of the argument the author must assures me that the studies’ results accurately reflect the characteristic and learning habits of the whole students.
In this editorial the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
author
concludes that hearing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
on tape would encourage the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to read
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
and learn more
eagerly
. To justify this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
conclusion
he points out that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
recorded on
Possible spelling mistake found.
audiocassette
tape can be an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
alternative for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who
are tired
of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
activity. He
also
cites that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
have emphasized on allowing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to hear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
read aloud. A careful scrutiny to the evidence reveals that it lends
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
credence to this argument.

First
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
author
unfairly
assumes that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
discouraged by lonely
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
activity will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
enthusiasm towards hearing the audio versions. They might
be displeased
by hearing too since they are not interested in the subjects and contents of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
, or they might seem eager at
first
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
lose their attention and desire in long term. Without considering and ruling out these and other possibilities the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
author
cannot
substantially
conclude that the audio versions would be
highly
beneficial.

Second, even assuming that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
remain enthusiastic in long term it does not guarantee their eager and progress in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
. Their eagerness might be
merely
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of considering the activity of hearing as an entertainment
rather
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
their
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
lessons and
they may pay no deep attention to the content of the audio
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Therefore
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
author
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
conclusion
about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students’
more eager
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
would be specious.

Third, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
author
provides no evidence that the results of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
are
statistically
reliable. In order to achieve a strong
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
conclusion
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies’
sample
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be
A more concise phrase may lose no meaning and sound more powerful.
sufficient in size
and representative of the
overall
population of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
discouraged by
merely
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
. Lacking evidence of a
sufficiently
representative sample the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
author
cannot
justifiably
rely on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
to draw any conclusion.

In sum, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
author
fails to convince me. To bolster this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
conclusion
, he
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
account for other possible factors in discouraging the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
and provide information about their long term
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
improvements after
being exposed
to hearing the audio
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
. To better assess the strength of the argument the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
author
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
The verb 'must' requires the base form of the verb: "assure"
assures
me that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies’
results
accurately
reflect the characteristic and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
habits of the whole
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS letter The following appeared in a letter to the editor of a local newspaper. " Too much emphasis is placed on the development of reading skills in elementary school. Many students who are discouraged by the lonely activity of reading turn away from schoolwork mer

Letter
  American English
5 paragraphs
360 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts





Get more results for topic:
  • The following appeared in a letter to the editor of a local newspaper."Too much emphasis is placed on the development of reading skills in elementary school. Many students who are discouraged by the lonely activity of reading turn away from schoolwork mer