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The following is a letter to the editor of an environmental magazine."The decline in the numbers of amphibians worldwide clearly indicates the global pollution of water and air. Two studies of amphibians in Yosemite National Park in California confirm my

The following is a letter to the editor of an environmental magazine. " The decline in the numbers of amphibians worldwide clearly indicates the global pollution of water and air. Two studies of amphibians in Yosemite National Park in California confirm my AjaKL
In this editorial the author asserts that the decrease in the numbers of amphibians worldwide is because of the global pollution of water and air. To support this assertion he cites two studies of amphibians in Yosemite National Park in California showing that seven species of amphibians in the park with abundant numbers of each species has declined to four species with drastically reduced numbers of each one from 1915 to 1992. He also claims that this decline can not be attributed to the introduction of trout into the park's waters since it has occurred only in Yosemite and is not a worldwide event. A close scrutiny to the evidence reveals that it lends little credence to this argument. First, the author provides no evidence that the studies’ results are statically reliable. In order to establish a strong conclusion, the studies’ sample must be sufficient in size and representative of the overall population of amphibians worldwide. Lacking evidence of a sufficiently representative sample, the author cannot justifiably rely on the studies to draw any conclusion. Second, the author unfairly assumes that the decline in the population of the amphibians in the park is due to the water and air contamination. There might be other reasons such as lack of medical care and dearth of healthy foods for the amphibians which lead to outbreak of diseases among the animals or to their malnutrition and consequently their high number of mortality. And without considering and ruling out these and other possible causes the author cannot substantially impute this decline to pollution. Third, the author unreasonably concludes that trout cannot be the real reason for the Yosemite decline since it does not explain the worldwide decline. Even assuming that this decline has been experienced worldwide, different places around the world can hold distinct reasons for this decline based on the various environmental and climate features in different areas. Therefore, lacking clear opposite evidence, the trout can be the distinct reason in decrease of amphibian in the Yosemite National Park without contracting with the worldwide decline. In sum, this conclusion is not well supported. To bolster it the author must assures me that the studies’ results reflect the cause of decline in the whole population of amphibians worldwide. To better assess the strength of this argument I need to know about other probable factors which has contributed to this decline in the park.
In this editorial the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
author
asserts that the decrease in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
numbers
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amphibians
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
worldwide
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the global pollution of water and air. To support this assertion he cites two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amphibians
in Yosemite National
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Park
in California showing that seven species of
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amphibians
in the
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park
with abundant
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numbers
of each species has declined to four species with
drastically
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
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numbers
of each one from 1915 to 1992. He
also
claims that this
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decline
can not
be attributed
to the introduction of trout into the park's waters since it has occurred
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
in Yosemite and is not a
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worldwide
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
event
. A
Consider using "scrutiny".
close scrutiny
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
evidence
reveals that it lends
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
credence to this argument.

First
, the
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author
provides no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
evidence
that the
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studies’
results are
statically
reliable. In order to establish a strong conclusion, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies’
sample
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be
A more concise phrase may lose no meaning and sound more powerful.
sufficient in size
and representative of the
overall
population of
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amphibians
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
worldwide
. Lacking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
evidence
of a
sufficiently
representative sample, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
author
cannot
justifiably
rely on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
to draw any conclusion.

Second, the
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author
unfairly
assumes that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decline
in the population of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amphibians
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
park
is due to the water and air contamination. There might be other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
such as lack of medical care and dearth of healthy foods for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amphibians
which lead to outbreak of diseases among the animals or to their malnutrition and
consequently
their high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of mortality. And without considering and ruling out these and other possible causes the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
author
cannot
substantially
impute this
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decline
to pollution.

Third, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
author
unreasonably
concludes that trout cannot be the real
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
for the Yosemite
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decline
since it does not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
worldwide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decline
. Even assuming that this
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decline
has
been experienced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
worldwide
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
places around the world can hold distinct
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
for this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decline
based on the various environmental and climate features in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
areas.
Therefore
, lacking
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
opposite
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
evidence
, the trout can be the distinct
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reason
in decrease of
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amphibian
in the Yosemite National
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Park
without contracting with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
worldwide
decline.

In sum, this conclusion is not
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
well supported
. To bolster it the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
author
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
The verb 'must' requires the base form of the verb: "assure"
assures
me that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies’
results reflect the cause of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decline
in the whole population of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amphibians
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
worldwide
. To better assess the strength of this argument I need to know about other probable factors which has contributed to this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decline
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
park
.
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IELTS letter The following is a letter to the editor of an environmental magazine. " The decline in the numbers of amphibians worldwide clearly indicates the global pollution of water and air. Two studies of amphibians in Yosemite National Park in California confirm my

Letter
  American English
5 paragraphs
399 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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  • The following is a letter to the editor of an environmental magazine."The decline in the numbers of amphibians worldwide clearly indicates the global pollution of water and air. Two studies of amphibians in Yosemite National Park in California confirm my