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some people like to spend their money as soon as they earn it, while others think it is better to save their money for some time in the future.

some people like to spend their money as soon as they earn it, while others think it is better to save their money for some time in the future. 7W26A
Money concerns are a major cause of stress and anxiety in the modern world. In my opinion, It is a really wise idea to save money for the future. I feel this way for two main reasons, which I will explore in the following essay. To begin with, Nowadays people saving money for the their future education. A person say, " Education is the passport to the future, for tomorrow belongs to those who prepare for it today". Therefore, education is valuable to everyone. My own experience is compelling example of this, one year ago I sincerely want join the math club. But that's too expensive, Therefore, I since that they I saving money for the math club. Today I can join to the my dream math club. Secondly, saving money for the future reason two is big prchase. Everyone can't suddenly buy big purchase. Accordingly, people need save money for their future. Big purchase is difficult obstacles for medium class family. For example, two years ago my family need to move other apartment. But we don't have lot of money, thus we're loan from the bank. Then my family realized need to the save money for the future. In conclusion, I believe that it is better to save money for the futurerather than spend it right away. I feel this way because we gain the ability to make better financial decisions as we mature, and because saving money helps us avoid the humiliating effects of unexpected financial loan.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Money
concerns are a major cause of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
and anxiety in the modern world. In my opinion, It is a
really
wise
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
save
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
. I feel this way for two main reasons, which I will explore in the following essay. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, Nowadays
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
saving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
for the their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
education. A person say,
Don't put a space on both sides of a quote symbol
"
Education is the passport to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
, for tomorrow belongs to those who prepare for it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
.
Therefore
, education is valuable to everyone. My
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
experience is compelling example of this, one year ago I
sincerely
want
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
the math club.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
that's too expensive,
Therefore
, I since that they I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
saving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
for the math club.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Today
I can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
to
A determiner cannot combine with a possessive pronoun. Did you mean simply "my dream" or "the dream"?
the my dream
math club.
Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
saving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
reason two is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
Possible spelling mistake found.
prchase
. Everyone can't
suddenly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
.
Accordingly
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
need
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
save
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Big
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
is difficult obstacles for medium
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
family.
For example
, two years ago my family need to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
other apartment.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
we don't have
It seems that an article is missing.
lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
,
thus
we're loan from the bank. Then my family realized need to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
save
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
.
In conclusion
, I believe that it is better to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
save
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
for the
Possible spelling mistake found.
futurerather
than spend it right away. I feel this way
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
we gain the ability to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
better financial decisions as we mature, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
saving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
us avoid the humiliating effects of unexpected financial loan.
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IELTS letter some people like to spend their money as soon as they earn it, while others think it is better to save their money for some time in the future.

Letter
  American English
1 paragraphs
249 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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