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Your English teacher has found new penfriend for you

Your English teacher has found new penfriend for you OloVG
Dear Joy, I’m writing this mail to you to get to know about you as a pen friend. Mrs. Damayanthi gave me your address to me since I was looking for a pen friend for quite some time. First, I would tell you about my self so you can know about me very well. Hope you have atleast one in common. I’m 35 years old and currently working as an accountant in a Construction Company. I heard that you are a Musician which is one of my interested area. I usually listen to English and Sinhala songs, specially fond of 80s and 90s songs. I know I’m a bit old is gold type of person. Apart from music I really like to travel and explore different part of the country even different countries. Whenever I got free time or a long weekend I used to plan a trip with my best buddies and travel. I like eating different types of foods, and get to know people. Specially hot and spicy food. So hope you now know something about me and I also very much eager to know about yourself and your interests. Waiting for a reply soon. All the best. Best Regards, Mahesh Perera
Dear Joy,

I’m writing this mail to you to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
know
about you as a
This expression is normally spelled as one or with hyphen.
pen friend
. Mrs.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Damayanthi
gave me your

address to me since I was looking for a
This expression is normally spelled as one or with hyphen.
pen friend
for quite
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
time.
First
, I would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
you about my

self
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
you can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
know
about me
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
well. Hope you have
Possible spelling mistake found.
atleast
one in common.

I’m 35 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
and
currently
working as an accountant in a Construction
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Company
. I heard that you are

a Musician which is one of my interested area.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
usually
listen to English and
Possible spelling mistake found.
Sinhala
songs,
specially
fond

of 80s and 90s songs.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
know
I’m a bit
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
is gold type of person. Apart from music I
really
like to travel

and explore
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
part of the country even
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
countries. Whenever I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
free time or a long

weekend I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to plan a trip with my best buddies and travel. I like eating
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
types of foods, and

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
know
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.
Specially
hot and spicy food.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
hope you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
know
something about me and I
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
much eager to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
know
about yourself and

your interests. Waiting for a reply
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
. All the best.

Best Regards,

Mahesh
Possible spelling mistake found.
Perera

IELTS letter Your English teacher has found new penfriend for you

Letter
  American English
6 paragraphs
203 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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