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describe a local environmental issue that affects you, explain what you would like to do to help, suggest how can it be avoided in the future

describe a local environmental issue that affects you, explain what you would like to do to help, suggest how can it be avoided in the future 26BWw
Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing in connection with the advertisement you published recently in your newspaper regarding the environmental initiatives in our city. Let me bring to your attention an issue we have in our community. A large amount of garbage are floating on the surface of our city lake which we use for drinking, that waste is poisoning the water and harming the marine life. On this occasion, I would like to offer help with aid from three coworkers to clean the lake through the weekend, and remove all of the garbage on the lake sides. Also, I would like to offer some suggestions to prevent this from happening again; We can add some signs around the lake prohibit people from throughing their waste in the lake, additionally we can make some advertisements to increase people awareness of its consequences. I hope you take this into consideration. Yours faithfully, Amr Masoud
Dear Sir or Madam,

I am writing in connection with the advertisement you published recently in your newspaper regarding the environmental initiatives in our city.

Let
me bring to your attention an issue we have in our community. A large amount of garbage are floating on the surface of our city
lake
which we
use
for drinking, that waste is poisoning the water and harming the marine life.

On this occasion, I would like to offer
help
with aid from three coworkers to clean the
lake
through the weekend, and remove
all of the
garbage on the
lake
sides.

Also
, I would like to offer
some
suggestions to
prevent
this from happening again; We can
add
some
signs around the
lake
prohibit
people
from
throughing
their waste in the
lake
,
additionally
we can
make
some
advertisements to increase
people
awareness of its consequences.

I hope you take this into consideration.

Yours
faithfully
,

Amr
Masoud
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IELTS letter describe a local environmental issue that affects you, explain what you would like to do to help, suggest how can it be avoided in the future

Letter
  American English
8 paragraphs
153 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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