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Request information about the schools overseas to study English

Request information about the schools overseas to study English 7W8Bk
Dear SirI would appreciate it if you could give me some information about schools overseas in order to study English. Firstly, I would like to be aware of the specific facilities of that school what I mean that I would be greatful to study at school totally modern. Secondly, I also need an accommodation for my staying. I can say that without any hesitation I don't mind sharing the room with other students but I am really pleased to live an accommodation that is near the school. Finally, my last concern is that the meals which are prepared for vegetarians. Could you give any information about such kind of restaurants or cafes which is located near the school
Dear
Possible spelling mistake found.
SirI
would appreciate it if you could give me
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
information about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
overseas in order to study English.
Firstly
, I would like to be aware of the specific facilities of that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
what I mean that I would be
Possible spelling mistake found.
greatful
to study at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
totally
modern.
Secondly
, I
also
need
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply "accommodation".
an accommodation
for my staying. I can say that without any hesitation I don't mind sharing the room with other students
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I am
really
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
pleased
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply "accommodation".
an accommodation
that is
near the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
.
Finally
, my last concern is that the meals which
are prepared
for vegetarians. Could you give any information about such kind of restaurants or
'cafes' is an imported foreign expression, which originally has a diacritic. Consider using "cafés"
cafes
which
is located
near the
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
school
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IELTS letter Request information about the schools overseas to study English

Letter
  American English
1 paragraphs
117 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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