Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Last weekend you attended the Canada Day community picnic. The event was a potluck, so everyone brought a dish of food to share. Some people, including you, have allergies or can’t eat some types of food, such as nuts and seafood, so you included a list of ingredients with your dish. No one else did this.

Last weekend you attended the Canada Day community picnic. The event was a potluck, so everyone brought a dish of food to share. Some people, including you, have allergies or can’t eat some types of food, such as nuts and seafood, so you included a list of ingredients with your dish. No one else did this. YyNRr
Dear Picnic Manager: Unlike earlier, last Saturday's picnic at Tommy's park was unforgettable. My family, specially my six-year-old daughter, will never forget the mobile petting zoo. She really enjoyed touching rabbits and cows. For my wife, it was just like a kitty party as most of her friends were there. Needless to say, having an ingredients' list is of utmost importance these days where most of us have the issues such as diabetes and cholesterol resulting in restricted diet. Also, there are people who are vegetarian or health conscious. Making them aware about what is inside could make their life risk-free. Going forward, it would be great if we could make it mandatory to have such list along with our food items. Additionally, is it possible for all to let the organizer aware in advance, say a week ago, about what they would bring in the party? This would avoid the situation of having the same snacks brought by many picnickers. A suitable and a variety of dishes is enough for us to smile. Regards, Manu
Dear Picnic Manager:

Unlike earlier, last Saturday's picnic at Tommy's park was unforgettable. My family,
specially
my six-year-
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
daughter, will never forget the mobile petting zoo. She
really
enjoyed touching rabbits and cows. For my wife, it was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
like a kitty party as most of her friends were there.

Needless to say, having an ingredients' list is of utmost importance these
It is better to use 'days' with the time-relative pronoun 'when': "days when". (Alternatively, use 'in/on which')
days where
most of us have the issues such as diabetes and cholesterol resulting in restricted diet.
Also
, there are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who are vegetarian or health conscious. Making them aware about what is inside could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their life
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
-free.

Going forward, it would be great if we could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it mandatory to have such list along with our food items.
Additionally
, is it possible for all to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
the organizer aware in advance, say a week ago, about what they would bring in the party? This would avoid the situation of having the same snacks brought by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
picnickers. A suitable and a variety of dishes is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
for us to smile.

Regards,

Possible spelling mistake found.
Manu
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS letter Last weekend you attended the Canada Day community picnic. The event was a potluck, so everyone brought a dish of food to share. Some people, including you, have allergies or can’t eat some types of food, such as nuts and seafood, so you included a list of ingredients with your dish. No one else did this.

Letter
  American English
6 paragraphs
175 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts
  • 6band
    Letter to Property Agent to Enquire about Properties
    Dear Mr. Smith, I am writing to enquire about properties in Beaverton and Hillsboro Oregon area. As I am planning to buy a house in 2-3 months. I work as Data Scientist for an E-commerce company in Canada and I got this excellent opportunity to work in Oregon, United States. So I decided to make m...
  • 6band
    complaint about food processor
    Dear Sir/Madam, the reason I am writing to you is poor quality of a food processor, in your store two weeks ago. which I bought in your store two weeks ago. The first malfunction that I notice was safety lock that demanded applying of great force. My wife had to ask me for help, because she wasn't...
  • 5band
    Letter to Local Council to inform about damaged road
    Dear Mr. Smith, I am writing to inform you about the damaged road right in front of my house. I am John Doe residing at house 6844 on overlook drive Hillsboro. A portion of the overlook drive in front of my house has developed pits in the past few weeks. Many kids play on the road during the day...
  • 5.5band
    Historical site not visited by local
    His book that Toursist visit to muscum and hang essay sites but local avaid it. In this coming be will discuss why local not intersected it museum and historical placering Towncan be enrou-ged for visiting to museum inhistorical places visiting to historical site and museum help is to increasing cu...
  • 6band
    You have recently ordered an item on the internet.
    This letter is to inform you that I am a little disappointed with the item that I ordered from your online store last July 29, 2021 Friday. The bag has red stains on the right lower side of it and I thought it would be ok but my friends saw it and told me that the stains were so obvious. It was pla...
  • 7band
    you live near a university and would like to earn some extra money by renting a room in your apartment. to a student.
    Dear Sir or Madam, My name is Kate and I am working as a Software Engineer in Adaptavist Sdn Bhd. I lived alone by myself in a 3 room apartment nearby your university. I’m writing this letter to you because I would like to rent out 1 of my available rooms to the university students. My apartment i...





Get more results for topic:
  • Last weekend you attended the Canada Day community picnic. The event was a potluck, so everyone brought a dish of food to share. Some people, including you, have allergies or can’t eat some types of food, such as nuts and seafood, so you included a list of ingredients with your dish. No one else did this.