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Moving to another city for a job

Moving to another city for a job GROw

I am writing this letter to inform you that I got a job in Rajkot and I have to join the office from next week. I need some help regarding the Rajkot as I am going to visit the first time. I am extremely busy in my current job to complete my last-minute formalities in the current organization. I have not found enough time to explore the nearest area to my office in Rajkot before coming. I have ever experienced living in Metro city if you can share the details of how much commute time is required to travel to my organization by public transportation. It would be good if you give me an approximate number of living costs per month including rental accommodation for a family member of three. I am eagerly awaiting a response from you.

I am writing this letter to inform you that I This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :acquired
got
 a job in Rajkot and I This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:ought to
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :consolidatefuse
join
 the office from next
 week. I need This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:a number of
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :assistassistance
help
 regarding the Rajkot as I am going to visit the first
 time.

Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
 am extremely
 busy in my This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :contemporarymodern
current
 job to complete my last-minute formalities in the This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :contemporarymodern
current
 organization. Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
 have not found This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:abundance
enough
 time to explore the nearest area to my office in Rajkot This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:previouslyprior to
before
 coming.

Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
 have ever experienced living in Metro city if you can share the This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :particulars
details
 of how much commute time is required
 to travel to my organization by public transportation. It would be This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :beneficialproduct
good
 if you give me an approximate number of living costs per month including rental accommodation for a family member of three.

I am eagerly
 awaiting a response from you. 

IELTS letter Moving to another city for a job

Letter

American English

4 paragraphs

138 words

This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1

4.0

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
?
One main idea per paragraph
?
Include an introduction and conclusion
?
Support main points with an explanation and then an example
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
?
Vary your linking phrases using synonyms

Lexical Resource: 6.5

Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes

Grammatical Range: 6.5

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
Check your writing for errors

Task Achievement: 5.0

Answer all parts of the question
?
Present relevant ideas
Fully explain these ideas
?
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Labels Descriptions

?
Currently is not available
Meet the criteria
Doesn't meet the criteria