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Missing the friend's party

Missing the friend's party L9e2p
I am writing to apologize for missing your party yesterday. I am looking after my baby who has high temperature at the moment. He has a flu as well as his upper teeth are growing so I had no choice. I do appreciate that not visiting your party without warning is quite disgraceful. I sincerely apologize for this and regret that I made you waited during your important day. I will visit your house after my son recovers.  Please accept my apologize once again. Yours sincerelyShohsanam
I am writing to apologize for missing your party yesterday. I am looking after my baby who has high temperature at the moment. He has a flu
as well
as his upper teeth are growing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
I had no choice. I do appreciate that not visiting your party without warning is quite disgraceful. I
sincerely
apologize for this and regret that I made you waited during your
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
day.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
will visit your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
after my son recovers.  
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Please
accept my apologize once again. Yours
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
sincerelyShohsanam
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IELTS letter Missing the friend's party

Letter
  American English
1 paragraphs
85 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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