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live with a family and take careof kid

live with a family and take careof kid jVJJX
Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing in reference to your advert in the magazine, regarding a person who can home-stay and take care of the kid for a short period. I am confident that I will be able to meet your requirements as I am very good at taking care of the house and the kids. I love cooking and if you like Indian curries, I can make vegetarian dishes. It will be a extremely good opportunity for me. Being the eldest in the family I had been assigned responsibility of my younger brother and sister, from a very young age, while my parents were at work. I find myself extremely comfortable with the children and know to feed and engage them in various learning/play activities. My neighbours would be ready to vouch for my abilities as on several occasions they have left their kids with me. I arrived earlier in Australia to get acquainted with the culture and lifestyle before I plan to apply for post-graduate courses. Meanwhile, I will be researching course options and preparing for the admission formalities in the top tier universities. I am looking for options that will allow me to live, work and earn to manage expenses until I get admitted. In anticipation of a reply from you. Yours faithfully Gaurav
Dear Sir or Madam,

I am writing in reference to your advert in the magazine, regarding a person who can home-stay and take care of the kid for a short period. I am confident that I will be able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
your requirements as I am
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
at taking care of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
and the kids.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
cooking and if you like Indian curries, I can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
vegetarian dishes. It will be
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
extremely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
opportunity for me.

Being the eldest in the family I had
been assigned
responsibility of my younger brother and sister, from a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
young age, while my parents were at work. I find myself
extremely
comfortable with the children and know to feed and engage them in various learning/play activities. My
Possible spelling mistake. 'neighbours' is British English.
neighbours
would be ready to vouch for my abilities as on several occasions they have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
their kids with me.

I arrived earlier in Australia to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
acquainted with the culture and lifestyle
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
I plan to apply for post-graduate courses. Meanwhile, I will be researching course options and preparing for the admission formalities in the top tier universities. I am looking for options that will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
me to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
, work and earn to manage expenses until I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
admitted.

In anticipation of a reply from you.

Yours
faithfully


Gaurav
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IELTS letter live with a family and take careof kid

Letter
  American English
7 paragraphs
217 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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