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Letter to municipal councillor

Letter to municipal councillor MwD6L
I am writing this letter on behalf of all members of my locality to bring into your notice the increasing number of stray dogs and problems arising due to it. These stray dogs attack people randomly and anytime. An eight year-old girl was attacked by these stray dogs. She was hospitalised and doctor said that the trauma will last with her all her life. Thus, people especially female and children's safety is at stake. The dogs bark at vehicles which implies the people can be seriously injured in dangerous accident. I hope that you will seriously look into the matter and take necessary actions to ensure safety of society members. Thanking you!
I am writing this letter on behalf of all members of my locality to bring into your notice the increasing number of stray
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dogs
and problems arising due to it. These stray
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dogs
attack
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
randomly
and anytime. An eight year-
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
girl
was attacked
by these stray
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dogs
. She was
Possible spelling mistake. 'hospitalised' is British English.
hospitalised
and doctor said that the trauma will last with her all her life.
Thus
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
especially
female and children's safety is at stake. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dogs
bark at vehicles which implies the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can be
seriously
injured in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
accident. I hope that you will
seriously
look into the matter and take necessary actions to ensure safety of society members. Thanking you!
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IELTS letter Letter to municipal councillor

Letter
  American English
1 paragraphs
112 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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