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Letter is of Requesting information letter

Letter is of Requesting information letter 73YnY
Dear Sir or MadamI have read your advertisement in "Times" of January 5th in 2021 and would like to participate in this seminar. I am planning to be a manager in the future and that's why I found this advertisement important. I have read your advertisement but I am not sure if you would have explained about it in a detail. I would be grateful whether you could tell me what the price is. I would also like to know more details about the seminar. It would be better receive it as soon as possible but not later than a week before flight. You could send me the above -mentioned information to my e-mail or a fax. I look forward to your reply at your earliest convenience. Yours faithfullyJames Bond.
Dear Sir or
Possible spelling mistake found.
MadamI
have read your advertisement in
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
Times
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
of January 5th in 2021 and would like to participate in this seminar. I am planning to be a manager in the future and that's why I found this advertisement
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
. I have read your advertisement
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I am not sure if you would have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explained
about it in a detail.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
would be grateful whether you could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
me what the price is.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
would
also
like to know more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
about the seminar. It would be better receive it as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
as possible
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not later than a week
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
flight. You could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
me the above -mentioned information to my e-mail or a fax. I look forward to your reply at your earliest convenience. Yours
Possible spelling mistake found.
faithfullyJames
Bond.

IELTS letter Letter is of Requesting information letter

Letter
  American English
1 paragraphs
130 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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