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I am writing to complain about voccum cleaner which I recently bought from your shop

I am writing to complain about voccum cleaner which I recently bought from your shop WymrN
Dear Sir, I am writing to complain about vacuum cleaner which I recently bought from your shop. After only four days things started to go incorrect. On the 2nd of April I visited one of your local shop in oder to buy a vacuum cleaner for my daughter. Looking around the shop I encountred expected item and I asked a shop assistant about it. After getting all iformation I decided to purchase it. Two days later, my daughter made a call and said about the problem of the item when she used to the machine for the first time, it work properly and the crpets are clean very well. However, when she utilized it the second time there seemed to have been a malfunction while It was working. The carpets still had quite a lot of dust when she clean. Furthemore when she tried using another the same thing happened. In addition to this, the machine has strange very loud voice. I am looking forward to hearing from you as soon as possible and to reciving a new vocuum cleaner, please give this matter your immedate attention. Your faithfullyNiyozmetova Zebo
Dear Sir, I am writing to complain about vacuum cleaner which I recently
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
from your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shop
.
“After” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
After
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
four days things
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to go incorrect. On the 2nd of April I visited one of your local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shop
in
Possible spelling mistake found.
oder
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
a vacuum cleaner for my daughter. Looking around the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shop
I
Possible spelling mistake found.
encountred
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expected
item and I asked a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shop
assistant about it.
“After” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
After
getting all
Possible spelling mistake found.
iformation
I decided to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
it. Two days later, my daughter made a call and said about the problem of the item when she
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to the machine for the
first
time, it
Did you mean "works"?
work
properly
and the
Possible spelling mistake found.
crpets
are clean
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
well.
However
, when she utilized it the second time there seemed to have been a malfunction while It was working. The carpets
still
had quite
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
dust when she clean.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Furthemore
when she tried using another the same thing happened.
In addition
to this, the machine has strange
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
loud voice. I am looking forward to hearing from you as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
as possible and to
Possible spelling mistake found.
reciving
a new
Possible spelling mistake found.
vocuum
cleaner,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
please
give this matter your
Possible spelling mistake found.
immedate
attention. Your
Possible spelling mistake found.
faithfullyNiyozmetova
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
Zebo

IELTS letter I am writing to complain about voccum cleaner which I recently bought from your shop

Letter
  American English
1 paragraphs
189 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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