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email to enter the competition

email to enter the competition 6aPbG
Dear Mr. Shafique, I hope you are all fun and frolic. I hear by, i saw your advertise in the newspaper about free membership in the leisure center. I am already using your leisure center but i am not a member of it yet. Mostly i use leisure center in my free time once in a week. I want this membership because i want to become a permanent member of your center furthermore i enjoy there very much. In your leisure center all the basic facilities are available but i would like to say you that there are the deficiencies regarding Gym equipment, i feel sometime in the morning mostly peoples wait for there turn to use the tredmil machine, dumbel. looking forward to a prompt responce. Your simcerely, Shafique
Dear Mr.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Shafique
, I hope you are all fun and frolic. I hear by,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
your
The word 'advertise' is a verb. Did you mean the noun "advertisement"?
advertise
in the newspaper about free membership in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leisure
center. I am already using your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leisure
center
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
am not a member of it
yet
.
Mostly
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leisure
center in my free time once in a week. I want this membership
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
want to become a permanent member of your center
furthermore
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
enjoy there
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
much. In your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leisure
center all the basic facilities are available
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
Did you mean "I"?
i
would like to say you that there are the deficiencies regarding Gym equipment,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
feel sometime in the morning
mostly
peoples wait for there turn to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the
Possible spelling mistake found.
tredmil
machine,
Possible spelling mistake found.
dumbel
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
looking
forward to a prompt
Possible spelling mistake found.
responce
.

Your
Possible spelling mistake found.
simcerely
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Shafique
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IELTS letter email to enter the competition

Letter
  American English
2 paragraphs
129 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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