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During a recent plane journey, you sat next to a businessman who owns a chain of restaurants. You talked to him and he suggested that you should contact him about a possible job in one of his restaurants. Write a letter to this businessman. In your letter, remind him when and where you met tell him what kind of job you are interested in say why you think you would be suitable for the job

During a recent plane journey, you sat next to a businessman who owns a chain of restaurants. You talked to him and he suggested that you should contact him about a possible job in one of his restaurants. Write a letter to this businessman. In your letter, remind him when and where you met tell him what kind of job you are interested in say why you think you would be suitable for the job O8kp
Dear ben, I hope you are doing well. My name is saarthi, the guy who met you in flight departing from Dublin to Galway on 23rd march 2019. I hope you remember that we had a conversation regarding the job you would recommending me at your hotel which completely matches my profile. As mentioned earlier I have pursued my masters in hotel management from National university of Ireland university and not to mention that you are a notable alumnus from that institution, mulling over your offer I would like to apply for the designation of hotel manager. I have already having previous experience for 4 years at three-star resort near to salt hill, Galway as a hotel manager. Prior to this, I worked part time at mc-Donald as supporting staff in kitchen nearly about 1 year while completing my education. I would like to inform you that I am having all the qualities which are needed to hotel manager to perform efficiently and effectively. I have attached and mailed you my CV to mail address discussed earlier. Eager to hear a positive reply from you. Kind regards, Yours sincerely, Saarthi Pandey
Dear
Possible spelling mistake found.
ben
,

I hope you are doing well. My name is
Possible spelling mistake found.
saarthi
, the guy who met you in flight departing from Dublin to Galway on 23rd
The month "March" needs to be capitalized.
march
2019. I hope you remember that we had a conversation regarding the job you would
The verb 'would' requires the base form of the verb: "recommend"
recommending
me at your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hotel
which completely matches my profile.

As mentioned earlier I have pursued my masters in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hotel
management from National university of Ireland university and not to mention that you are a notable alumnus from that institution, mulling over your offer I would like to apply for the designation of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hotel
manager. I have already having previous experience for 4 years at three-star resort near to salt hill, Galway as a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hotel
manager. Prior to this, I worked
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
part time
at
Possible spelling mistake found.
mc-Donald
as supporting staff in kitchen
nearly
about 1 year while completing my education. I would like to inform you that I am having all the qualities which
are needed
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hotel
manager to perform
efficiently
and
effectively
. I have attached and mailed you my CV to mail address discussed earlier.

Eager to hear a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
reply from you.

Kind regards,

Yours
sincerely
,

Possible spelling mistake found.
Saarthi
Possible spelling mistake found.
Pandey
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IELTS letter During a recent plane journey, you sat next to a businessman who owns a chain of restaurants. You talked to him and he suggested that you should contact him about a possible job in one of his restaurants. Write a letter to this businessman. In your letter, remind him when and where you met tell him what kind of job you are interested in say why you think you would be suitable for the job

Letter
  American English
7 paragraphs
190 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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