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Do you think festivals are important?

Do you think festivals are important? RRrmY
Absolutely yes, festivals are considered something extremely precious to people in different countries. Because of so many reasons. To begin with, the festival can show the richness of the traditions of each country. Take Vietnam as an example. In my country, there are many traditional festivals such as Hung King's death anniversary, Lunar New Year, Vu Lan festival and many other special festivals. Because there are many festivals, each festival has its characteristics and meaning. As a result, Vietnam has a very diverse and unique tradition. Additionally, festivals all have ties to ancient history. So if we know how to preserve and organize according to the right occasion, we have partly paid respect to the ancient people who created it. And at the same time, we have participated and learned more about the traditional characteristics of our country in general and countries around the world in particular.
Absolutely
yes,
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festivals
are considered
something
extremely
precious to
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people
in
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different
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countries
.
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Because
of
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so
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many
reasons. To
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begin
with, the
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festival
can
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show
the richness of the traditions of each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. Take Vietnam as an example. In my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
traditional
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festivals
such as Hung King's death anniversary, Lunar New Year,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Vu
Possible spelling mistake found.
Lan
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festival
and
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many
other special
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festivals
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
festivals
, each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
festival
has its characteristics and meaning.
As a result
, Vietnam has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
diverse and unique tradition.
Additionally
,
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festivals
all have ties to ancient history.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
if we know how to preserve and organize according to the right occasion, we have partly paid respect to the ancient
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who created it. And at the same time, we have participated and learned more about the traditional characteristics of our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
in general
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
around the world
in particular
.
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IELTS letter Do you think festivals are important?

Letter
  American English
1 paragraphs
147 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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