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Dear Sir, I am writing this letter to explain to you the conditions in the room that is allocated to me and to request you for accommodation change.

Dear Sir, I am writing this letter to explain to you the conditions in the room that is allocated to me and to request you for accommodation change. M269
Dear Sir, I am writing this letter to explain to you the conditions in the room that is allocated to me and to request you for accommodation change. To get to the point directly, I share a room with one of the senior students, who will be graduating this year. Since her curriculum does not involve much studying, she is always hosting a party in our room. As I am a freshman, I have a lot to study and do an additional amount of work as a teaching assistant, but I am unable to concentrate on any of the work because of the huge noise and the big gathering. As a result, I have fallen behind on many of the assignments to be submitted. I would kindly request you to shift me to any vacant room that is available. I prefer a non-sharing accommodation on campus. I look forward to hearing from you. Yours Sincerely, Prasanna
Dear Sir,

I am writing this letter to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
to you the conditions in the room that
is allocated
to me and to request you for accommodation
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to the point
directly
, I share a room with one of the senior students, who will be graduating this year. Since her curriculum does not involve much studying, she is always hosting a party in our room.

As I am a freshman, I have a lot to study and do an additional amount of work as a teaching assistant,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I am unable to concentrate on any of the work
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the huge noise and the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
gathering.
As a result
, I have fallen behind on
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
of the assignments to
be submitted
.

I would kindly request you to shift me to any vacant room
that is
available. I prefer a non-sharing accommodation on campus.

Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
look forward to hearing from you.

Yours
Sincerely
,

Possible spelling mistake found.
Prasanna
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IELTS letter Dear Sir, I am writing this letter to explain to you the conditions in the room that is allocated to me and to request you for accommodation change.

Letter
  American English
8 paragraphs
155 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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