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complaining later for hotels heating/cooling system not working

complaining later for hotels heating/cooling system not working A3N1w
Dear Sir, The Manager, Anjali hotels Hope you are doing well. I am writing this latter on behalf of the humidity ventilation and air conditioning system of your hotel. I would like to inform you about my stay on the date of 23rd December in your hotel, I was searching a comfortable stay at that time. It a cold winter in city of Paris as we already knew that it is a season of winter and the snowfall had just started. So I am just searching a comfortable warm stay in city and I preffered to live in this accommodation. But I found surprising that the heating system in midnight was not so perfect as I was thinking. I likely to have knew that it would be preferably 22 degree Celsius but it would not. So I am requesting and also complaining you about this manner to check your entire HVAC system for prevention of unnecessary failure of the system working. Hope you will understand my problem and try to resolve this complaint. With regards, Mitul Patel A tourist stayed in room 404 on 23rd December.
Dear Sir,

The Manager,

Anjali hotels

Hope you are doing well. I am writing this latter on behalf of the humidity ventilation and air conditioning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
of your hotel. I would like to inform you about my stay on the date of 23rd December in your hotel, I was searching a comfortable stay at that time.
It seems that a verb is missing after "It". Please verify.
It
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cold
winter in city of Paris as we already knew that it is a season of winter and the snowfall had
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
I am
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
searching a comfortable warm stay in city and I
Possible spelling mistake found.
preffered
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in this accommodation.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
I found surprising that the heating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
in midnight was not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
perfect as I was thinking. I likely to have
Use past participle here: "known".
knew
that it would be
preferably
22 degree Celsius
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it would not.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
I am requesting and
also
complaining you about this manner to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
your entire HVAC
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
for prevention of unnecessary failure of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
working. Hope you will understand my problem and try to resolve this complaint.

With regards,

Possible spelling mistake found.
Mitul
Patel

A tourist stayed in room 404 on 23rd December.

IELTS letter complaining later for hotels heating/cooling system not working

Letter
  American English
8 paragraphs
186 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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