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asking for some days off for training course

asking for some days off for training course RwwRo
Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing to request some days off to participate in a training course related to my current duties in the company. Nowadays, it’s essential for any digital marketer to be completely updated with new tools to ensure all the procedures are functioning in the marketing team. Recently, Google announced a new software called Big Query that I believe can be useful for optimizing different stuff. Hubspot is going to run a practical, skill oriented course about Big Query that helps the attendees achieve advanced proficiency. It contains some classes to teach the basics and a project to be implemented by the tool. The course is going to be held from September 20th to September 22th in London, therefore I am asking to be off from September 19th to September 23th, considering two days for travelling there. I would appreciate my request to be noted and I hope this course helps the whole corporation. Yours faithfully, Amir
Dear Sir or Madam,

I am writing to request
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
days off to participate in a training
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
course
related to my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
duties in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
.

Nowadays, it’s essential for any digital marketer to be completely updated with new tools to ensure all the procedures are functioning in the marketing team. Recently, Google announced a new software called
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Big
Query that I believe can be useful for optimizing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
stuff.

Possible spelling mistake found.
Hubspot
is going to run a practical,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
oriented
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
course
about
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Big
Query that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
the attendees achieve advanced proficiency. It contains
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
classes to teach the basics and a project to
be implemented
by the tool.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
course
is going to
be held
from September 20th to September
Please check the suffix, if this is an ordinal number.
22th
in London,
therefore
I am asking to be off from September 19th to September
Please check the suffix, if this is an ordinal number.
23th
, considering two days for travelling there.

I would appreciate my request to
be noted
and I hope this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
course
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
the whole corporation.

Yours
faithfully
,

Amir
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IELTS letter asking for some days off for training course

Letter
  American English
8 paragraphs
160 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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