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apologize for the absence in the meeting

apologize for the absence in the meeting ajP7
Dear Sir, I am writing this letter to apologize for my absence in the meeting that was scheduled yesterday with the client officials. I deeply regret my decision and feel very terrible for letting you down. I was on my way to work like everyday, when I got a call from the hospital informing me about my mother’s condition and stating that she has jaundice and has been bedridden. Since my mother lived an hour away from my place and she does not have anyone else other than me I had no choice but to attend to my mother’s needs. I am taking care of my mother right now and the doctor has informed she will be well in coming couple of days. I will resume my duties then and will work extra time to compensate my absence at work. Again, I am really sorry for my absence and hope you will understand my condition. yours faithfully, Shashank
Dear Sir,

I am writing this letter to apologize for my absence in the meeting that
was scheduled
yesterday with the client officials. I
deeply
regret my decision and feel
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
terrible for letting you down.

Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
was on my way to work like
'Everyday' is an adjective. Did you mean "every day"?
everyday
, when I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
a call from the hospital informing me about my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mother’s
condition and stating that she has jaundice and has been bedridden. Since my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mother
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lived
an hour away from my
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
place and
she does not have anyone else other than me I had no choice
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
to attend to my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mother’s
needs.

I am taking care of my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mother
right
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
and the doctor has informed she will be well in coming couple of days. I will resume my duties then and will work extra time to compensate my absence at work.

Again, I am
really
sorry for my absence and hope you will understand my condition.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
yours
faithfully
,

Possible spelling mistake found.
Shashank

IELTS letter apologize for the absence in the meeting

Letter
  American English
7 paragraphs
157 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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