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A self introductory letter

A self introductory letter ELRXD

To whom it may concern, My name is Ojimmadu Nkiruka Maryimmaculate, and I’d like to tell you a little bit about my interests, goals and mostly I am writing in application for a scholarship. I am from Nigeria and I am 18years old. I live at a city called Aba in Abia state, I have lived there my whole life, my everyday activities included going to school, reading books, watching Tv. I am a graduate of Cor Mariae girls secondary school. I joined the jet club and also partook in certain sports activities back then at school which gave me the position of sports prefect, I’m an active student who studied 9 subjects In secondary school which are all sciences and I’m eager to study more and gain more knowledge through the higher institution. I like dancing, reading, solving problems, playing games and more. I enjoy the hospital activities especially when I watch the operations and surgeries ongoing on Tv, my natural tendency to care and love for treating and helping people has made me more enthusiast on pursing working in the hospitals in other to help patients and make them happy. I am willing to partake in this because I believe I would benefit greatly from the overseas and also to learn more advancely, learn different cultures, languages and meet new people, it is valuable to atleast step out of my comfort zone and adapt to new environment. This scholarship will represent to me as an opportunity to achieve my goals as a surgeon. I will strive hard to get good grades and make an impact to the school and other students, this will give me they opportunity to work with

To whom it may concern,

My name is Possible spelling mistake found.
Ojimmadu
Possible spelling mistake found.KirkNerudaNkrumahAkiraKira
Nkiruka
Possible spelling mistake found.Mary immaculate
Maryimmaculate
, and I’d like to This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :inform
tell
 you a Reduce redundancy by using "little" or "bit".littlebit
little bit
 about my interests, goals and mostly
 I am writing in application for a scholarship. I am from Nigeria and I am 18years This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:ancientagedmature
old
. I This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :reside
live
 at a city called Possible spelling mistake found.ABAAkaAPAAnaCBAPBA
Aba
 in Possible spelling mistake found.AsiaAriaApiaABAABISAFIA
Abia
 state, I have This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :resided
lived
 there my whole life, my everyday activities included going to You use this word too often, consider replacing it withinstituteacademyuniversityhalljailfaculty
school
, reading books, watching Possible spelling mistake found.TVToMTVCTVTTUV
Tv
. Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
 am a graduate of Cor Possible spelling mistake found.MarineMariaMarieMarianMaria eMariah
Mariae
 girls secondary You use this word too often, consider replacing it withinstituteacademyuniversityhalljailfaculty
school
. Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :consolidatedfused
joined
 the jet club and also
 partook in certain sports activities back then at You use this word too often, consider replacing it withinstituteacademyuniversityhalljailfaculty
school
 which gave me the position of sports prefect, I’m an active student who studied 9 subjects In secondary You use this word too often, consider replacing it withinstituteacademyuniversityhalljailfaculty
school
 which are all sciences and I’m eager to study more and gain more knowledge through the higher institution.

Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
 like dancing, reading, solving problems, playing games and more. Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
 enjoy the hospital activities especially
 when I This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :monitor
watch
 the operations and surgeries ongoing on Possible spelling mistake found.TVToMTVCTVTTUV
Tv
, my natural tendency to care and This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :admireadore
love
 for treating and helping This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :individualsnationsociety
people
 has made me more enthusiast on pursing working in the hospitals in other to This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :assistassistance
help
 patients and This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :createconstructmanufactureproduce
make
 them happy. Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
 am willing to partake in this This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:due to the factin light of the fact thatowing to the fact that
because
 I believe I would benefit greatly
 from the overseas and also
 to learn more Possible spelling mistake found.advanceadvancedadvances
advancely
, learn This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:various
different
 cultures, languages and This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :attain
meet
 new This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :individualsnationsociety
people
, it is valuable to Possible spelling mistake found.at least
atleast
 step out of my comfort zone and adapt to new environment.

This scholarship will represent to me as an opportunity to achieve my goals as a surgeon. I will strive This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :arduous
hard
 to This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :acquire
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :beneficialproduct
good
 grades and This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :createconstructmanufactureproduce
make
 an impact to the You use this word too often, consider replacing it withinstituteacademyuniversityhalljailfaculty
school
 and other students, this will give me Do not use a noun immediately after the pronoun 'they'. Use a verb or an adverb, or possibly some other part of speech.
they opportunity
 to work Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraphwith.with!with?with:with,with;
with