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a letter to my friend an mother

a letter to my friend an mother kYNRW
Dear Sir I have been doing some work for a long time, such as writing articles on websites. Today I got a job writing an article from the site I am working on. But the topic of the article worried me a little. I had a lot of difficulties because of the issue of Industrialization in Modern Europe. I wanted to consult you because I don't know enough about Europe or anything related to Europe and I know your Phd study on this topic. First of all, let me tell you about the article and some problems related to the subject of the article. The article I am going to write should include the industrialization in Modern Europe and the developments in this process. Since the subject of my article is a very large topic, I think it is not appropriate to mention very detailed subtopics. As a result of some researches on the subject, I found some information. For example; I've reached some notable titles like The Three Waves of Industrialization, Industrialization as Evolution, and Industrialization as Great Spurt. Considering these headings within the subject of the article, it should not tell me what I should talk about in general. I think that the information about the article I will write is related to your field of expertise and I request your help.
Dear Sir

I have been doing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
work for a long time, such as writing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
articles
on websites.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Today
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
a job writing an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
article
from the site I am working on.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
the topic of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
article
worried me a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
. I had
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
difficulties
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the issue of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Industrialization
in Modern Europe. I wanted to consult you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
I don't know
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
about Europe or anything related to Europe and I know your
The more common abbreviation of the term 'philosophiae doctor' is "PhD".
Phd
study on this topic.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
me
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
you about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
article
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
problems related to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
article
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
article
I am going to write should include the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industrialization
in Modern Europe and the developments in this process. Since the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
of my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
article
is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
large topic, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
it is not appropriate to mention
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
detailed subtopics.
As a result
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
researches on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
, I found
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
information.
For example
; I've reached
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
notable titles like The Three Waves of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Industrialization
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Industrialization
as Evolution, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Industrialization
as Great Spurt. Considering these headings within the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
article
, it should not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
me what I should talk about
in general
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that the information about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
article
I will write
is related
to your field of expertise and I request your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
.
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IELTS letter a letter to my friend an mother

Letter
  American English
2 paragraphs
224 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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