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A friend has agreed to look after your house and pet while you are on holiday. Write a letter to your friend. v.3

A friend has agreed to look after your house and pet while you are on holiday. Write a letter to your friend. v. 3
Dear Sam, I feel so relieved as you have stepped up to take care of my place and my dog when I plan to go on a vacation. I can't thank you enough. To be honest, I was really hoping that you would respond to my request when I posted it on Facebook. I understand that taking care of new stuff can be overwhelming. If you need to reach me for anything while I am away, just send a message either on WhatsApp or on Facebook Messenger. I was told by the resort in which I shall be staying, uninterrupted internet access is available there. My mobile phone, however, will remain switched off. If not, I will keep on receiving calls from work which will ultimately defeat the purpose of this getaway. As for Tommy, the dog, he doesn't really need much care. Just ensure that he gets 3 meals a day at 6-8 hour interval. Also, let him be outside in the evening whenever possible so that he can play with the ball. Also, don't forget to bathe him preferably every other day so that he doesn't stink. I know that you will not stay at my house full time so there aren't many chores that you need to do. Some small things like emptying the trash can, cleaning the parking area and watering the plants need to be done regularly. Once again, I really appreciate the help you are extending to me and hope to return this favour sometime. Best regards, Rouhullah
Dear Sam,

I feel
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
relieved as you have stepped up to take care of my place and my dog when I plan to go on a vacation. I can't thank you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
. To be honest, I was
really
hoping that you would respond to my request when I posted it on Facebook.

I understand that taking care of new stuff can be overwhelming. If you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to reach me for anything while I am away,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
a message either on WhatsApp or on Facebook Messenger. I was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
told
by the resort in which I shall be staying, uninterrupted internet access is available there. My mobile phone,
however
, will remain switched off. If not, I will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
on receiving calls from work which will
ultimately
defeat the purpose of this getaway.

As for Tommy, the dog, he doesn't
really
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
much care.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Just
ensure that he
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
3 meals a day at 6-8 hour interval.
Also
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
him be outside in the evening whenever possible
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that he can play with the ball.
Also
, don't forget to bathe him
preferably
every other day
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that he doesn't stink.

I know that you will not stay at my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
full time
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
there aren't
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
chores that you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to do.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
things like emptying the trash can, cleaning the parking area and watering the plants
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to
be done
regularly
.

Once again, I
really
appreciate the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
you are extending to me and hope to return this
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
sometime.

Best regards,

Possible spelling mistake found.
Rouhullah
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
A new language is a new life.
Persian Proverb

IELTS letter A friend has agreed to look after your house and pet while you are on holiday. Write a letter to your friend. v. 3

Letter
  American English
8 paragraphs
253 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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