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A friend had a new born baby.

A friend had a new born baby. QLeEK
Dear Fida, I am writing to congratulate you and your family on this happy occasion of your child’s birth and, hope the child and his mother are doing fine. I am thinking to visit you and bring some presents for the new bundle of happiness. Let me explain my plan in detail. I have ordered a teddy bear from an Amazon online store and hoping to receive the delivery anytime next week. Considering the area you live in, Texas is notorious for bears all over the world, it would be nice for the little guy to have a connection with bears from a very young age. I am planning my trip to Texas for the last weeks of November, as I would be free from work due to the winter holidays in Canada. Would you tell me a suitable time to visit you in November? I cannot wait to hear from you. Your friend, Muhammad Amin
Dear
Possible spelling mistake found.
Fida
,

I am writing to congratulate you and your family on this happy occasion of your child’s birth and, hope the child and his mother are doing fine. I am thinking to visit you and bring
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
presents for the new bundle of happiness.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Let
me
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
my plan in detail. I have ordered a teddy bear from an Amazon online store and hoping to receive the delivery anytime
next
week. Considering the area you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in, Texas is notorious for bears all over the world, it would be nice for the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
guy to have a connection with bears from a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
young age.

I am planning my trip to Texas for the last weeks of November, as I would be free from work due to the winter holidays in Canada. Would you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
me a suitable time to visit you in November?

I cannot wait to hear from you.

Your friend,

Muhammad
Possible spelling mistake found.
Amin
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IELTS letter A friend had a new born baby.

Letter
  American English
7 paragraphs
155 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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