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Your class has listened to a radio discussion programme about facilities which should receive money from local authorities.

Your class has listened to a radio discussion programme about facilities which should receive money from local authorities. Q8pbP
The government will receive money for local buildings. Nowadays our country need some facilities like these: museums, sport centres and public gardens. It is true that local authorities are prevalently held by money in many organizations. According to that position they should organise tours around the cities because people need to know a lot of information about buildings. For instance, students, workers will be tired after hard day of studying and working. They could be aware of relaxing but our museums are not popular with everybody. On the one hand, if the country needs that people should be healthier they must build and open different kind of sport sections as: football, golf, fighting, wrestling, tennis and mental games. Additionally, the lifestyle of the nation will increase. On the other hand I agree that the authorities may be aware of solving these kinds of major problems. If they cannot solve key issues, the government allow to businessmen to build in the towns green spaces, parks. Nations walking in open air enjoy seeing such a spectacular places and will thank for who did those facilities. For example, if the mood of individuals are fine, they will achieve success in their jobs, studies as well as in their life. To sum up, the government should pay attention of the developing of the country not only receiving money on facilities but also for lifestyle too.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
will receive money for local buildings. Nowadays our country need
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
facilities like these: museums, sport
Possible spelling mistake. 'centres' is British English.
centres
and public gardens.

It is true that local authorities are
Possible spelling mistake found.
prevalently
held by money in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
organizations. According to that position they should
Possible spelling mistake. 'organise' is British English.
organise
tours around the cities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
need to know
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
information about buildings.
For instance
, students, workers will
be tired
after
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
day of studying and working. They could be aware of relaxing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
our museums are not popular with everybody.

On the one hand, if the country needs that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
should be healthier they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
build and open
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
kind of sport sections as: football, golf, fighting, wrestling, tennis and mental games.
Additionally
, the lifestyle of the nation will increase.

On the other hand
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that the authorities may be aware of solving these kinds of major problems.

If they cannot solve key issues, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
to businessmen to build in the towns green spaces, parks. Nations walking in open air enjoy seeing such a spectacular places and will thank for who did those facilities.
For example
, if the mood of individuals
Possible agreement error. Did you mean "is"? (Some collective nouns can be treated as both singular and plural, so 'are' is not always incorrect.)
are
fine, they will achieve success in their jobs, studies
as well
as in their life.

To sum up, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should pay attention of the developing of the country not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
receiving money on facilities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
for lifestyle too.
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IELTS essay Your class has listened to a radio discussion programme about facilities which should receive money from local authorities.

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
231 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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