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Your brother cannot come on a trip that you planned Write a letter to your friend inviting him her to join instead Please say Where and when do you plan to go Why can t your brother come Give a short description of the trip v.1

Your brother cannot come on a trip that you planned Write a letter to your friend inviting him her to join instead Please say Where and when do you plan to go Why can t your brother come Give a short description of the trip v. 1
In the United Kingdom, aged people spend their lives in old age homes where caretakers look after their health and medications. While, some people believe that the authority has the responsibility to pay for the old age homes, others opine that it is the duty of the families to incur the cost. This essay agrees that it is the responsibility of the political party in power because firstly, people pay huge taxes to the ministry for such amenities and secondly, families are already burdened to meet the expenses of their children and other basic needs. Elderly people have paid a huge amount of tariffs for the development of basic infrastructures, thus it is the duty of the authority to ensure that grey-haired people are getting basic facilities and a warm environment. This is to say, taxes of people should be invested in building retirement homes where old people can spend their time with people of their age group along with professional nurses who will be able to take the obligation of their physical and mental health. As a result elderly people will not have to worry about their expenses. To elucidate, a recent study conducted by Oxford University found that more than 80 percent of aging people believe that the ministry should pay for the old age homes. Furthermore, families of older people are already burdened with several responsibilities and thus, they cannot incur extra costs for retirement homes. In other words, the children of older people have to pay for their kids' education, insurance, food, and bills, since they are already burdened they cannot take the obligation for the payment of retirement home. For instance, a recent study by The Times showed that more than 60 percent of the families of older people have financial burdens and constraints and hence, they are not able to pay their care and well being. To conclude, although some people believe that families must incur the expenses of old people's wellbeing and safekeeping. However, In my opinion, I vehemently agree that the ministry should ensure to take care of older people as they have paid huge taxes to the ministry and the families already have huge financial stress.
In the United Kingdom, aged
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
spend their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homes
where caretakers look after their health and medications. While,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that the authority has the responsibility to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homes
, others opine that it is the duty of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
to incur the cost. This essay
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agrees
that it is the responsibility of the political party in power
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
huge
taxes to the ministry for such amenities and
secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
already
burdened to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
the expenses of their children and other basic needs.

Elderly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have paid a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
huge
amount of tariffs for the development of basic infrastructures,
thus
it is the duty of the authority to ensure that
Possible spelling mistake found.
grey-haired
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are getting basic facilities and a warm environment. This is to say, taxes of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should
be invested
in building retirement
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homes
where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can spend their time with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
group along with professional nurses who will be able to take the obligation of their physical and mental health.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
a result elderly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
worry about their expenses. To elucidate, a recent study conducted by Oxford University found that more than 80 percent of aging
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that the ministry should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
homes.

Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
already
burdened with several responsibilities and
thus
, they cannot incur extra costs for retirement
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homes
.
In other words
, the children of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
for their kids' education, insurance, food, and bills, since they are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
already
burdened they cannot take the obligation for the payment of retirement home.
For instance
, a recent study by The Times
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
that more than 60 percent of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have financial burdens and constraints and
hence
, they are not able to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
their care and
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
well being
.

To conclude
, although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
incur the expenses of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's
Possible spelling mistake found.
wellbeing
and safekeeping.
However
, In my opinion, I
vehemently
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that the ministry should ensure to take care of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
as they have paid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
huge
taxes to the ministry and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
already
have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
huge
financial
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
Learn everything you can, anytime you can, from anyone you can; there will always come a time when you will be grateful you did.
Sarah Caldwell

IELTS essay Your brother cannot come on a trip that you planned Write a letter to your friend inviting him her to join instead Please say Where and when do you plan to go Why can t your brother come Give a short description of the trip v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
365 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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