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youngsters addict to junk food.

youngsters addict to junk food. p5wMD
There is no denying the fact that, fast food habit seriously affects the young generation. In this fast-living world youngsters and even children are addicted to fast food rather than homely food. However, some parents think that children can eat what they loved. But I firmly believe that all the generation especially the growing generations must eat from home that’s like homely prepared food. Another persistent argument in that in the modern scenario parents have no time to spend with their children and they don’t have time to cook for them. So, they allow them to grab their junk food as the like. Moreover, this gradually addicted to this type of food and drinks. In other hand, it may cause dangerously to their health. Moreover, they avoid to eat freshly prepared homely food too. Another pertinent argument in that fast food shops are cleverly attracted to teenagers and children. They introduce daily newly combos and added new flavors in their pizzas, burgers and fries etc. to cherish their savor. Furthermore, students have the opportunity to explore all the mouthwatering dishes from their own college cafeterias and school canteens. So, most of the parents may think to pamper their children in these ways. Friends together they start enjoy their junk food life and gradually avoid their super quality healthy food style. On the other hand, some of the parents are truly getting time or making time to spend qualitatively to their children and for their family. By the time they bring the good food habit to their children. To end, in these time there is too difficult to make a good food habit in their life.
There is no denying the fact that,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
habit
seriously
affects the young generation. In this
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
-living world youngsters and even
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are addicted
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
rather
than homely
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
.
However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
can eat what they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
loved
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
I
firmly
believe that all the generation
especially
the growing generations
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
eat from home that’s like homely prepared food.

Another persistent argument in that in the modern scenario
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
have no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to spend with their
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
children and
they don’t have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to cook for them.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
them to grab their junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
as the like.
Moreover
, this
gradually
addicted to this type of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
and drinks. In other hand, it may cause
dangerously
to their health.
Moreover
, they
The verb 'avoid' is used with the gerund form: "avoid eating".
avoid to eat
freshly
prepared homely
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
too.

Another pertinent argument in that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
shops are
cleverly
attracted to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. They introduce daily
newly
combos and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
added
new flavors in their pizzas, burgers and fries etc. to cherish their savor.
Furthermore
, students have the opportunity to explore all the mouthwatering dishes from their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
college cafeterias and school canteens.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
to pamper their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
in these ways. Friends together they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
enjoy their junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
life and
gradually
avoid their super quality healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
style.

On the other hand
,
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
are
truly
getting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
or making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to spend
qualitatively
to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
and for their family. By the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
they bring the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
habit to their children.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
, in these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
there is too difficult to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
habit in their life.
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IELTS essay youngsters addict to junk food.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
275 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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