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Living in Small Villages

Living in Small Villages mWwrL
A few decades ago, small villages abounded with many villagers where all the inhabitants knew each other and had peaceful rural lifestyles until urbanization. But in contrast with the past, the world has become more industrialized, and many villagers have moved to large cities where they have more job opportunities than the villages. There are positive and negative aspects of living in small villages, especially in developing countries. Residents from rural villages, from my point of view, can experience four main benefits. First of all, the rates of using motor vehicles are lower in small village communities so that there aren't traffic jams; also traffic accidents are fewer there. Secondly, the amount of air pollution emitted from road vehicles is low as villagers, especially in developing countries, seldom use motor vehicles. Therefore, there would be less impact on villagers' health, the environment, and the climate of the villages. Moreover, most of the personalities of the populations are positive: honest, kind, friendly, and united. For instance, if the villagers build a bridge or hold traditional festivals, their unity can be seen obviously. Nonetheless, there are also disadvantages for inhabitants living in small villages. Firstly, some basic infrastructure facilities: electricity, hospitals, markets, schools, etc. , are lacking in villages far from the towns. It means that villagers have to bear the difficulties due to the lack of those facilities, e. g. , the high illiteracy rate, transportation barriers to access health care for surgical conditions. In addition, as the main production activity in villages is farming, they could also suffer food insecurity because of bad weather conditions. Furthermore, the telecommunication system is still developing in many rural areas; thus, there might be slow internet network connections in villages. Overall, it may be more disadvantageous to live in small villages even though there are also good aspects in that case. That's why the governments of the countries are trying to improve small villages to the best of their abilities.
A few decades ago,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
villages
abounded with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
villagers
where all the inhabitants knew each other and had peaceful rural lifestyles until urbanization.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
in contrast
with the past, the world has become more industrialized, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
villagers
have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
moved
to large cities where they have more job opportunities than the villages.

There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
aspects of living in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
villages
,
especially
in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developing countries
. Residents from rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
villages
, from my point of view, can experience four main benefits.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, the rates of using motor vehicles are lower in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
village
communities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that there aren't traffic jams;
also
traffic accidents are fewer there.
Secondly
, the amount of air pollution emitted from road vehicles is low as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
villagers
,
especially
in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developing countries
, seldom
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
motor vehicles.
Therefore
, there would be less impact on villagers' health, the environment, and the climate of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
villages
.
Moreover
, most of the personalities of the populations are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
: honest, kind, friendly, and united.
For instance
, if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
villagers
build a bridge or hold traditional festivals, their unity can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
obviously
.

Nonetheless, there are
also
disadvantages for inhabitants living in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
villages
.
Firstly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
basic infrastructure facilities: electricity, hospitals, markets, schools, etc.
Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
,
are lacking in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
villages
far from the towns. It means that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
villagers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
bear the difficulties due to the lack of those facilities,
There should be no space here: "e.g.".
e. g.
Loose punctuation mark.
,
the high illiteracy rate, transportation barriers to access health care for surgical conditions.
In addition
, as the main production activity in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
villages
is farming, they could
also
suffer food insecurity
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
weather conditions.
Furthermore
, the telecommunication system is
still
developing in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
rural areas;
thus
, there might be slow internet network connections in villages.

Overall
, it may be more disadvantageous to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
villages
even though
there are
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
aspects
in that case
. That's why the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
of the countries are trying to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
villages
to the best of their abilities.
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IELTS essay Living in Small Villages

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
326 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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