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Young people use free time to videogames

Young people use free time to videogames NyjPd
What do we like to do in our free time? Watching movies or playing games? All of these are in front of the computer, so I completely agree that young people use their free time in relation to video games. Firstly, it can become a powerful tool to develop important skills. For example, they improve planning, create strategies, work in teams and make quick decisions. In addition, they teach great life lessons that develop empathy and respect. Secondly, gaming damages the physical development of young people. That is why they should take advantage of the time they spend sitting in front of the computer to do physical activities such as exercise or sports. On the other hand, it is important to take on challenges such as improving your physical, psychological, social, personal and professional skills. And if you are really skilled in that area, you could gain more experience, creativity and innovation in the field In conclusion, playing video games can be beneficial if you keep a balance, without neglecting other personal areas, so you have to make good decisions.
What do we like to do in our free time? Watching movies or playing games? All of these are in front of the computer,
so
I completely
agree
that young
people
use
their free time in relation to video games.

Firstly
, it can become a powerful tool to develop
important
skills
.
For example
, they
improve
planning, create strategies, work in teams and
make
quick decisions.
In addition
, they teach great life lessons that develop empathy and respect.

Secondly
, gaming damages the physical development of young
people
.
That is
why they should take advantage of the time they spend sitting in front of the computer to do physical activities such as exercise or sports.

On the other hand
, it is
important
to take on challenges such as improving your physical, psychological, social, personal and professional
skills
. And if you are
really
skilled in that area, you could gain more experience, creativity and innovation in the field

In conclusion
, playing video games can be beneficial if you
keep
a balance, without neglecting other personal areas,
so
you
have to
make
good
decisions.
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IELTS essay Young people use free time to videogames

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
180 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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