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young people should spend time on cultural activities such as music and theater

young people should spend time on cultural activities such as music and theater Wg7kq
Many people think young people should spend more time on cultural activities such as music and theatre. Other face, some people advice young people should practice sport better. In my opinion, I think need to mixture play sports and watch cultural activities. Having lots of benefits when young people usually play sport. They can keep in shape, have a good health. Then, they can have a good time with their family and friend. They can reduce many diseases such as heart attack, obese, more and more. After young people play sport, they can choose wactch cultural such as music or theatre to chill out. They will have a sense of enjoyment. Watching cultural makes people feel comfortable and relieze stress. I believe young people will choose suitable activities for themselves. Both play sport and watch cutural I think it is good for young people.
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Many
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people
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think
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young
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people
should spend more time on
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cultural
activities such as music and
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theatre
. Other face,
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some
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people
advice
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young
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people
should practice
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sport
better. In my opinion, I
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think
need to mixture
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play
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sports
and
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watch
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cultural
activities.

Having lots of benefits when
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young
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people
usually
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
. They can
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keep
in shape, have a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
health. Then, they can have a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
time with their family and friend. They can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
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many
diseases such as heart attack, obese, more and more.

After
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young
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people
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play
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sport
, they can choose
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wactch
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cultural
such as music or
Possible spelling mistake. 'theatre' is British English.
theatre
to chill out. They will have a sense of enjoyment. Watching
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cultural
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
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people
feel comfortable and
Possible spelling mistake found.
relieze
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stress
.

I believe
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young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will choose suitable activities for themselves. Both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
Possible spelling mistake found.
cutural
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
it is
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good
for
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young
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people
.
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IELTS essay young people should spend time on cultural activities such as music and theater

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
144 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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