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You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. PrDuring a recent plane journey, you sat next to a businessman who owns a chain of restaurants. You talked to him and he suggested that you should contact him about a possible job in one of his restaurants. Wr v.42

PrDuring a recent plane journey, you sat next to a businessman who owns a chain of restaurants. You talked to him and he suggested that you should contact him about a possible job in one of his restaurants. Wr v. 42
In the modern world, peoples are working outside from their city. As a result, they are living alone and so they are adapted to live their life by their own. Well, it is not negative or positive. In my opinion, it is completely depends on the persons and their situations. Let's discuss in the essay. Firstly, Nowadays, the concept of joint family is vanishing from the society because of a number of reasons. One of them is, young people going to the employment in the other countries. For example, if a person is settling to abroad, prior they are going alone as the time passes, they started enjoying their life without interference of anybody. Another example, students are going abroad for higher studies and start to enjoy their life, because their parents were not there with them for making the restrictions. As we all know, the generation Z is having lack of patience and short temper, so this is the reason they avoid in life with their family and enjoy their own company. On the flip side, Living separately is not good and it creates a negative impact on the coming generation. Due to this, the families triple bond will turn to single bonds, that can be easily broken. There is very famous quote 'Unity Is Strength', it means if we will stay together, then it will strengthen the bond of our relationship. To conclude, mostly young generation feels to live by their own, reason being, they want to enjoy the life like a king and want to be the only emperor of their own kingdom. But, this is not good for the long term, because own life and own rule will not unite the world together.
In the modern world, peoples are working outside from their city.
As a result
, they are living
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
alone and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they
are adapted
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
by their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
. Well, it is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
or
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
. In my opinion, it is completely depends on the persons and their situations.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Let
's discuss in the essay.

Firstly
, Nowadays, the concept of joint family is vanishing from the society
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of a number of reasons. One of them is, young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
going to the employment in the other countries.
For example
, if a person is settling to abroad, prior they are going alone as the time passes, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
enjoying their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
without interference of anybody. Another example, students are going abroad for higher studies and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to enjoy their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
their parents were not there with them for making the restrictions. As we all know, the generation Z is having lack of patience and short temper,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
this is the reason they avoid in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
with their family and enjoy their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
.

On the flip side, Living
separately
is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
and it creates a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact on the coming generation. Due to this, the families triple bond will turn to single bonds, that can be
easily
broken.

There is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
quote 'Unity Is Strength', it means if we will stay together, then it will strengthen the bond of our relationship.

To conclude
,
mostly
young generation feels to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
by their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
, reason being, they want to enjoy the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
like a king and want to be the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
emperor of their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
kingdom.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, this is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for the long term,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rule
will not unite the world together.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
You can never understand one language until you understand at least two.
Geoffrey Willans

IELTS essay PrDuring a recent plane journey, you sat next to a businessman who owns a chain of restaurants. You talked to him and he suggested that you should contact him about a possible job in one of his restaurants. Wr v. 42

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
287 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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