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You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Countries around the world will be facing significant challenges relating not only to the environment, but population and education as well. What problems will your country face in the next ten years? How can t v.39

Countries around the world will be facing significant challenges relating not only to the environment, but population and education as well. What problems will your country face in the next ten years? How can t v. 39
So, according to few people children's playing activities have to be informed like which can help them in their academic otherwise there is no use of it. So here I am talking about educational activities, like it can be pretty useful. Because it has two advantages like children, are enjoying as well as getting some information. In this way they don't have to be forced to learn because this form of education is coming from play time. For example, playing "Sudoku", although it's a game, but it provides lots of information and children can definitely learn lot's of techniques which can certainly enhance their thinking abilities. In this para I will be talking about why other activities are not waste. Like let's take an example of some leisure activity like playing outside lets say "Hide and Seek", certainly it can't be considered as educational. So my one point is it helps children balance out their overall life, like it helps to ease out the pressure that they might be feeling from their studies. It can be considered as a break from the stressful activities, because as a child sometimes study could be very overwhelming. And also now there have been scientifically proven studies, which shows breaks or such leisure activities can boost children or any other person's performances. So to conclude, I must say that I disagree with the above statement like we cannot discard children's leisure activities just because it's not educational, because every activity has its own benefits. However, I do feel that there has to be a balance, because educational leisure activities can also help children as much as non-educational. However, excess of both can be bad.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, according
Did you mean "too"?
to
few
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
children's playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
be informed
like which can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
them in their academic
otherwise
there is no
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of it.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
here I am talking about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
educational
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
, like it can be pretty useful.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
it has two advantages like
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
, are enjoying
as well
as getting
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
information. In this way they don't
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
be forced
to learn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
this form of education is coming from play time.
For example
, playing
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
Sudoku
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
, although it's a game,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it provides lots of information and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
can definitely learn
Did you mean "lots"?
lot's
of techniques which can
certainly
enhance their thinking abilities.

In this para I will be talking about why other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
are not waste. Like
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
's take an example of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leisure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activity
like playing outside
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lets
say
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Hide
and Seek
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
,
certainly
it can't
be considered
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
educational
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
my one point is it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
balance out their
overall
life, like it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ease
out the pressure that they might be feeling from their studies. It can
be considered
as a break from the stressful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
as a child
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
study could be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
overwhelming. And
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
there have been
scientifically
proven studies, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
breaks or such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leisure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
can boost
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
or any other person's performances.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
to conclude
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
say that I disagree with the above statement like we cannot discard children's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leisure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it's not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
educational
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activity
has its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
benefits.
However
, I do feel that there
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
be a balance,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
educational
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leisure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
can
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
as much as non-educational.
However
, excess of both can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Countries around the world will be facing significant challenges relating not only to the environment, but population and education as well. What problems will your country face in the next ten years? How can t v. 39

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
280 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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