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You live in an English speaking country and you want to do some voluntary, unpaid work in a developing country. Write a letter to a company called Cultural Expeditions, which organizes such trips. In your letter: Explain why you want to do the voluntary wo v.1

You live in an English speaking country and you want to do some voluntary, unpaid work in a developing country. Write a letter to a company called Cultural Expeditions, which organizes such trips. In your letter: Explain why you want to do the voluntary wo v. 1
In the present world, people are unnecessarily consuming wastage which causes an environmental pollution. There are so many factors behind on increase of garbage. Even though, by taking proper precautions to reduce the amount of dust. In this essay, I will illustrate with probable reasons to elaborate further. Firstly, population is the primary factor for increasing the garbage. Many countries are producing a lot of wastage because of higher rate of population. Secondly, people are not taking as an accountability while producing wastage. They are so irresponsible when use groceries and cooking items. Consequently, they prepare excess food which causes more wastage in their dustbin. Finally, most of the countries are still using plastic bags which affects the environment badly. Furthermore, we cannot easily destroy the plastic bags. Because it has a lot of carbon content which is difficult to burn. And also, it pollutes the air too badly. Of course, if we take proper steps to reduce the wastage at some extent. People have to know the impact of increased wastage. The government needs to guide them with proper awareness programmes which explains the cons of increased garbage on global environment and steps to reduce that. Moreover, the government servants also destroy the garbage immediately at least once in a day. People also more conscious while cooking with all their groceries. They have more calculated to prepare the enough food which will reduce the wastage. In conclusion, I would say that we cannot completely reduce the wastage in a day. It takes time to reduce at some extent with above suggested ideas. However, the government could also take as a major responsibility to protect the global environment.
In the present world,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
unnecessarily
consuming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wastage
which causes
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply "environmental pollution".
an environmental pollution
. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
factors behind on increase of garbage.
Even though
, by taking proper precautions to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reduce
the amount of dust. In this essay, I will illustrate with probable reasons to elaborate
further
.

Firstly
, population is the primary factor for increasing the garbage.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
countries are producing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wastage
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of higher rate of population.
Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are not taking as an accountability while producing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wastage
. They are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
irresponsible when
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
groceries and cooking items.
Consequently
, they prepare excess food which causes more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wastage
in their dustbin.
Finally
, most of the countries are
still
using plastic bags which affects the environment
badly
.
Furthermore
, we cannot
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroy
the plastic bags.
“Because” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Because
it has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
carbon content which is difficult to burn. And
also
, it pollutes the air too
badly
.

Of course
, if we take proper steps to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reduce
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wastage
at
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extent.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
know the impact of increased
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wastage
. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
needs to guide them with proper awareness
Possible spelling mistake. 'programmes' is British English.
programmes
which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explains
the cons of increased garbage on global environment and steps to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reduce
that.
Moreover
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
servants
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroy
the garbage immediately at least once in a day.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
also
more conscious while cooking with all their groceries. They have more calculated to prepare the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
food which will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reduce
the wastage.

In conclusion
, I would say that we cannot completely
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reduce
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wastage
in a day. It takes time to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reduce
at
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extent with above suggested
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
.
However
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
could
also
take as a major responsibility to protect the global environment.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay You live in an English speaking country and you want to do some voluntary, unpaid work in a developing country. Write a letter to a company called Cultural Expeditions, which organizes such trips. In your letter: Explain why you want to do the voluntary wo v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
278 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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