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You have just graduated from university, and you want to take a year off before getting a job. Read information of two organizations which provide international internships for gap year students below. Explain which one you'd prefer to choose, and why.

You have just graduated from university, and you want to take a year off before getting a job. Read information of two organizations which provide international internships for gap year students below. Explain which one you'd prefer to choose, and why. QK9yy
A gap year is a semester that is intended to give students a break from academics to discover themselves. That one-year gap can also give people the time and experience to make tough decisions, such as deciding what they truly want to study or what career to pursue. Up to now, I have just graduated from university, and I find that it’s time to have interesting sabbaticals and a gap year off before getting a job. Finally, I made the decision to choose African Impact, which provides international internships to fulfill my hop. The first thing that attracted me to choosing African Impact was the places it organizes. The gap semester internships will take place in Africa, one of those special places you can't really describe until you go. I love Africa, where nature is beautiful and people are warm and friendly. Fortunately, Kenya, South Africa, Zimbabwe, Tanzania, and Zambia will be the places that I visit when participating in African Impact. Of five countries, Kenya is the one I love the most. Kenya, which is considered the cradle of mankind, is one of the best places to explore wildlife and is a mixture of African, Arab, and Indian cultures. Kenya is one of the countries with the best coffee and tea in the world. Life in Kenya is also one of the most interesting with friendliness, hospitality, kindness, and a willingness to help people. Secondly, the African Impact organization, which has international internships and launches meaningful volunteer campaigns, is a large organization with volunteer work. Volunteer work is always inspiring work for me. It not only brings a lot of value to people who are having a difficult time in life, but also creates benefits for volunteers such as meeting new people and building community; gaining knowledge and understanding other ways of life; or advancing a career by improving job prospects. Moreover, I am attracted when I see the mission of African Impact. The founders of African Impact launched the organization with the mission to create "genuine impacts with extraordinary experiences. " I find that this mission is really meaningful and unique. From this organization’s mission, I understand that they want to equip young people with education and skills to move out of poverty. Besides, the project’s organization also makes me have a good impression. The purpose of the project is to create education projects for children in tribal villages or take care of animals on a game reserve. Getting an education is a challenge for many children in Southern and Eastern Africa. I strongly believe that if I take part in this project and accompany with African Impact, I can call for a lot of support. Hence, organization can improve access to education by sponsoring school fees, enhancing school facilities, and providing after-school study spaces. It’s not only children, but also animals that should be concerned and protected. All of them create unique values and inspire for me a strong desire to help. I’m sure that African Impact will be a wonderful organization where I can contribute and express myself to bring a number of values to the community. Eventually, the reason I’d prefer to choose African Impact is that the organization was voted the top volunteer organization two years in a row. This achievement is tangible evidence of the ability and profession of this organization. Thus, it certainly offers some of the best gap year internship programs that make me improve my skills, knowledge, and resume. Year-round is enough time for me to discover, experience the continent, and complete my desire to help people. If I take part in this organization, I believe I will have the privilege of working alongside experts in my chosen field. It can be a difficult thing, but in sometimes-challenging environments I believe I can push my limits, change my perspectives, and have more fun
A
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gap
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
is a semester that
is intended
to give students a break from academics to discover themselves. That one-year
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gap
can
also
give
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and experience to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
tough decisions, such as deciding what they
truly
want to study or what career to pursue. Up to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
, I have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
graduated from university, and I find that it’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to have interesting sabbaticals and a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gap
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
off
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
getting a job.
Finally
, I made the decision to choose African
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Impact
, which provides international internships to fulfill my hop.

The
first
thing that attracted me to choosing African
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Impact
was the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
it organizes. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gap
semester internships will take
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
in Africa, one of those special
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
you can't
really
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
describe
until you go. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
Africa, where nature is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are warm and friendly.
Fortunately
, Kenya, South Africa, Zimbabwe, Tanzania, and Zambia will be the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
that I visit when participating in African
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Impact
. Of five countries, Kenya is the one I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
the most. Kenya, which
is considered
the cradle of mankind, is one of the best
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
to explore wildlife and is a mixture of African, Arab, and Indian cultures. Kenya is one of the countries with the best coffee and tea in the world. Life in Kenya is
also
one of the most interesting with friendliness, hospitality, kindness, and a willingness to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

Secondly
, the African
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Impact
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organization
, which has international internships and launches meaningful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
volunteer
campaigns, is a large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organization
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
volunteer
work.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Volunteer
work is always inspiring work for me. It not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
brings
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
value to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who are having a difficult
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
in life,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
creates
benefits for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
volunteers
such as meeting new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and building community; gaining knowledge and understanding other ways of life; or advancing a career by improving job prospects.

Moreover
, I
am attracted
when I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the mission of African
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Impact
. The founders of African
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Impact
launched the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organization
with the mission to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
create
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
genuine
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
impacts
with extraordinary experiences.
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
I find that this mission is
really
meaningful and unique. From this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organization’s
mission, I understand that they want to equip young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
out of poverty.
Besides
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
project’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organization
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
me have a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
impression. The purpose of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
project
is to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
create
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
projects
for children in tribal villages or take care of animals on a game reserve. Getting an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is a challenge for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
children in Southern and Eastern Africa. I
strongly
believe that if I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
take part
in this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
project
and
The usual collocation for "accompany" is "by," not "with." It is better to say this: "accompany by".
accompany with
African
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Impact
, I can call for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
support.
Hence
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organization
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
access to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
by sponsoring school fees, enhancing school facilities, and providing after-school study spaces. It’s not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
children,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
animals that should
be concerned
and protected. All of them
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
create
unique values and inspire for me a strong desire to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
. I’m sure that African
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Impact
will be a wonderful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organization
where I can contribute and express myself to bring a number of values to the community.

Eventually
, the reason I’d prefer to choose African
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Impact
is that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organization
was voted
the top
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
volunteer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organization
two years in a row. This achievement is tangible evidence of the ability and profession of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organization
.
Thus
, it
certainly
offers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of the best
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gap
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
internship programs that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
me
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
, knowledge, and resume. Year-round is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for me to discover, experience the continent, and complete my desire to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. If I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
take part
in this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organization
, I believe I will have the privilege of working alongside experts in my chosen field. It can be a difficult thing,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
-challenging environments I believe I can push my limits,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
my perspectives, and have more
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
fun
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IELTS essay You have just graduated from university, and you want to take a year off before getting a job. Read information of two organizations which provide international internships for gap year students below. Explain which one you'd prefer to choose, and why.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
642 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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