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you Facebook friend living in another city

you Facebook friend living in another city k5KPN
I'm so glad to writing this letter to you I really miss you and want you to see you soon and I want write something you can't believe on them you know I was really depressed at first because I leave my house and my dreamy city and you know that I don't have any choice I have to come here but now I'm really understand that how much I was stupid for being sad for leaving my house you know why? ! because I'm really happy in my new city and I love that and I have too much fun in here at first I should tell you about why people are so happy and interested about everything in here so as you know this city is a really busy city and the point is that all around the city you can have fun with anyone you want and anytime you know there is a to much rules that say you should respect to anyone idea's and that is why people love this city because they can believe in their self easier and their wishes be come true because no body stop them although people help themas you know I write a book and can you guess how I can do it? ? at first I just started to write just for my heart and one of my friend started to read that and she really make me feel confident and she say that to me you should continue this in a true way and she really helps me now I'm going to be rich by my writing it was really my dream and yes that's it and I want to try harder and be really successful in my life and in this city it can happen. so tell me about your self and your job what are you doing nowadays? ! I should say bye to you because I should leave just care about yourself bye
I'm
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
glad to writing this letter to
Consider adding a comma here.
you
I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
really
miss you and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
you to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
and I
Probably a preposition is missing after 'want'.
want write
something you can't believe on them you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
know
I was
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
really
depressed at
first
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
and my dreamy city and you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
know
that I don't have any choice I
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
here
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
I'm
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
really
Consider using a past participle here: "understood".
understand
that how much I was stupid for being sad for leaving my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
know
why? !
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
because
I'm
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
really
happy in my new city and I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
that and I have too much fun in here at
first
I should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
you about why
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
happy and interested about everything in here
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
as you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
know
this city is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
really
busy city and the point is that all around the city you can have fun with anyone you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
and anytime you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
know
there is a
Did you mean "too"?
to
Use "many" with countable nouns.
much
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
that say you should respect to anyone
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
's and
that is
why
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
this city
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they can believe in their self easier and their wishes be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
true
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
Did you mean "nobody"?
no body
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
them although
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
Possible spelling mistake found.
themas
you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
know
I write a book and can you guess how I can do it? ?
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
at
The comma is probably missing here: "first, I".
first I
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to write
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
for my heart and one of my friend
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to read
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
that and
she
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
really
The pronoun 'she' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "makes", "made".
make
me feel
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
confident and
she say that to me you should continue this
Consider replacing "in a true way" with the adverb for "true"; e.g., "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
in a true way
and she
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
really
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
me
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
I'm going to be rich by my writing it was
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
really
my dream and yes that's it and I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
to try harder and be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
really
successful in my life and in this city it can happen.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
so
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
me about your self and your job what are you doing nowadays? ! I should say bye to you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
I should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
care about yourself
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
bye
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay you Facebook friend living in another city

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
327 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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