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You are going to visit New Zealand for an English and Homestay program You have just received details of your homestay host family Write your first letter to the family In your letter introduce yourself ask the family some questions to get information tha v.1

You are going to visit New Zealand for an English and Homestay program You have just received details of your homestay host family Write your first letter to the family In your letter introduce yourself ask the family some questions to get information tha v. 1
Over the last decade, there is a tremendous rise in the number of people playing sports. This trend has led to an ongoing debate on the factors to the success of a sportsman. A section of the society thinks that players with the inherited ability can prosper in sports, while the other believes that one can achieve success with hard work and practice. I feel that a mix of both is needed, and this essay will elaborate on my view further and discuss both sides in details with relevant examples. On the one hand, if a person is born talented, one can quickly grasp the techniques of the required game. For example, Sachin Tendulkar, who is the greatest player of cricket, the game ever had started playing internationally at the age of 16 years. Likewise, it is not difficult to find similar examples in other sports such as football and hockey. It is mainly due to the natural ability one posses, not training and guidance. Therefore, it is not wrong to say that natural talent is one of a factor to become a successful sportsman On the other hand, some people argue that dedicated training and guidance can transform anyone into an established player. For example, a natural-born dancer may possess a flexible body and understanding of music, but to become an experienced choreographer, one needs proper training in various dance forms. They are ignoring the fact that competition is at its peak nowadays. One needs talent with hard work and a lot of practice to outshine others in the game. To conclude, although talent provides a right start, adequate guidance and discipline provides right direction. I, personally, feel that a correct proportion of both, talent and skill is needed for a player to become an extraordinary one. Therefore, I urge the government to provide free coaching to shape budding aspirants into world-class sportsman.
Over the last decade, there is a tremendous rise in the number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
playing sports. This trend has led to an ongoing debate on the factors to the success of a sportsman. A section of the society
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thinks
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
players
with the inherited ability can prosper in sports, while the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
believes that one can achieve success with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
work and practice. I feel that a mix of both
is needed
, and this essay will elaborate on my view
further
and discuss both sides in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
with relevant examples.

On the one hand, if a person
is born
talented, one can
quickly
grasp the techniques of the required game.
For example
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Sachin
Possible spelling mistake found.
Tendulkar
, who is the greatest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
player
of cricket, the game ever had
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
playing
internationally
at the age of 16 years.
Likewise
, it is not difficult to find similar examples in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
sports such as football and hockey. It is
mainly
due to the natural ability
Don't use the number 'one' with plural words. Did you mean "one poss", "one posse", "a poss", "a posse", or simply "posses"?
one posses
, not training and guidance.
Therefore
, it is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
to say that natural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talent
is one of a factor to become a successful sportsman

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
argue that dedicated training and guidance can transform anyone into an established
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
player
.
For example
, a natural-born dancer may possess a flexible body and understanding of music,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
to become an experienced choreographer, one needs proper training in various dance forms. They are ignoring the fact that competition is at its peak nowadays. One needs
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talent
with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
work and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
practice to outshine others in the game.

To conclude
, although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talent
provides a right
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
, adequate guidance and discipline provides right direction. I,
personally
, feel that a correct proportion of both,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talent
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
is needed
for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
player
to become an extraordinary one.
Therefore
, I urge the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
to provide free coaching to shape budding aspirants into world-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
sportsman.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay You are going to visit New Zealand for an English and Homestay program You have just received details of your homestay host family Write your first letter to the family In your letter introduce yourself ask the family some questions to get information tha v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
314 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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