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You and your family are planning to spend a weekend at a seaside hotel. Write a letter to the hotel making arrangements. v.1

You and your family are planning to spend a weekend at a seaside hotel. Write a letter to the hotel making arrangements. v. 1
There has been an ongoing debate whether children should be taught to be competitive or to work with their friends and classmates. While healthy rivalry could help children to become a stronger person, being co-operative make them a better one. On the one hand, a friendly competition among students in one class would benefit all of them. Since almost everyone wants to be the most outstanding, setting a competitive atmosphere would motivate them to study even more harder. As a short-term result, each learner would have not only made a faster progress on his study but there would also be a positive impact on the class-wide grade. Moreover, a graduate should be prepared with self-confidence and the experiences of competing with his old classmates before facing the adult life that is full of challenges. Because getting a job or maintaining a position in the company is nowhere near a pleasant competition. On the other hand, the sense of co-operation is even more important in the society life. Since most of the children now will be expected to work in a team later when they are hired, it is necessary to know how to collaborate with other people. For example, an employee needs to follow his boss’s instructions and co-operate with his teammates to solve the problems and benefit the company. As one famous quote said “If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together”, teamwork is the key to achieve more success in the future. After all, there has been no high achievers in the world that could work solo without receiving support from their assistants. Therefore, teachers should encourage this kind of attitude during the classes as giving out questions and projects that require students to discuss in pairs or small groups. In conclusion, while a spirit of competitiveness would get children higher grades at school, I believe co-operation is more essential in long-term targets.
There has been an ongoing debate whether
children
should
be taught
to be competitive or to work with their friends and classmates. While healthy rivalry could
help
children
to become a stronger person, being co-operative
make
them a better one.

On the one hand, a friendly competition among students in one
class
would benefit all of them. Since almost everyone wants to be the most outstanding, setting a competitive atmosphere would motivate them to study even
more harder
. As a short-term result, each learner would have not
only
made a faster progress on his study
but
there would
also
be a
positive
impact on the
class
-wide grade.
Moreover
, a graduate should
be prepared
with self-confidence and the experiences of competing with his
old
classmates
before
facing the adult life
that is
full of challenges.
Because
getting a job or maintaining a position in the
company
is nowhere near a pleasant competition.

On the other hand
, the sense of co-operation is even more
important
in the society life. Since most of the
children
now
will be
expected
to work in a team later when they
are hired
, it is necessary to know how to collaborate with other
people
.
For example
, an employee needs to follow his boss’s instructions and co-operate with his teammates to solve the problems and benefit the
company
. As one
famous
quote said “If you want to go
fast
, go alone. If you want to go far, go together”, teamwork is the key to achieve more success in the future.
After all
, there has been no high achievers in the world that could work solo without receiving support from their assistants.
Therefore
, teachers should encourage this kind of attitude during the classes as giving out questions and projects that require students to discuss in pairs or
small
groups.

In conclusion
, while a spirit of competitiveness would
get
children
higher grades at school, I believe co-operation is more essential in long-term targets.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
A foreign language is like a frail, delicate muscle. If you do not use it, it weakens.
Jhumpa Lahiri

IELTS essay You and your family are planning to spend a weekend at a seaside hotel. Write a letter to the hotel making arrangements. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
323 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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