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write an opinion post at least 100 words about the topic below " we should close all zoos and relese the animals into the wild''. To what extend to do agree or disagree

write an opinion post at least 100 words about the topic below " we should close all zoos and relese the animals into the wild''. To what extend to do agree or disagree NlBG2
Freedom is always important in the world. If humans lose their freedom, they will feel uncomfortable, so why can’t we think of how animals feel in the zoo? Some people will disagree with this statement, but for me, I totally agree with it for the following reasons. First of all, the zoo is out- of-date and cruel. Many years ago, people went to the zoo just to see the circus animals, but now, the number of visitors going to the zoo is not as much as before. Because of thinking that the games are very normal and they can see it on social networking. Also, the fate of the adult animals at the zoo is pitiful. According to PETA, people who go to the zoo tend to like to see small animals and to run for profit, many of the founders have greatly created cute little animals that attract visitors. On the contrary, zoos have the fear of limited matter so that adult animals who don’t make a lot of money are sold. The second reason is that the space in the zoo is not enough for the animals. Compared to the natural habitat, their home in the zoo is just a cramped cage, the animals can not be more free. Over a long period of time, this will make them feel depressed or even lead to suicide to escape. As I remember is that in 2016, I read the news about a killer whale named Morgan had committed suicide. At first, Morgan was lying over the edge of the pool and everyone thought that he was tired, however it took about 10 minutes for everyone to understand what was going on. We already know that Morgan was like committing suicide to escape from a life of captivity after 16 years. Furthermore, owning animals in the zoo is not good for their health. It is true that visitors or trainers feed them too much food but they don’t have a space to do exercise. That would cause the animals to suffer from disease like obesity and possibly reduce their life-spain. In conclusion, although some people think that the zoo is a good place for animals, I personally believe that we should close all zoos and release the animals into the wild.
Freedom is always
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
in the world. If humans lose their freedom, they will feel uncomfortable,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
why can’t we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
of how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
feel in the zoo?
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will disagree with this statement,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
for me, I
totally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with it for the following reasons.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, the zoo is out- of-date and cruel.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
years ago,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
went to the zoo
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the circus
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
, the number of visitors going to the zoo is not as much as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
of thinking that the games are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
normal and
they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
it on social networking.
Also
, the fate of the adult
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
at the zoo is pitiful. According to PETA,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who go to the zoo tend to like to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
and to run for profit,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
of the founders have
greatly
created cute
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
that attract visitors.
On the contrary
, zoos have the fear of limited matter
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that adult
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
who don’t
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
money
are sold
. The second reason is that the space in the zoo is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
. Compared to the natural habitat, their home in the zoo is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
a cramped cage, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
can not be more free. Over a long period of time, this will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them feel depressed or even lead to suicide to escape. As I remember is that in 2016, I read the news about a killer whale named Morgan had committed suicide. At
first
, Morgan was lying over the edge of the pool and everyone
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
that he
was tired
,
however
it took about 10 minutes for everyone to understand what was going on. We already know that Morgan was like committing suicide to escape from a life of captivity after 16 years.
Furthermore
, owning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
in the zoo is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for their health. It is true that visitors or trainers feed them too much food
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they don’t have a space to do exercise. That would cause the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
to suffer from disease like obesity and
possibly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
their
Possible spelling mistake found.
life-spain
.
In conclusion
, although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that the zoo is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
place for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
, I
personally
believe that we should close all zoos and release the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
into the wild.
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IELTS essay write an opinion post at least 100 words about the topic below " we should close all zoos and relese the animals into the wild''. To what extend to do agree or disagree

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
381 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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