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Write an essay about road accidents. what's your solutions?

Write an essay about road accidents. what's your solutions? 6LGEG
It goes without saying that road accident is one of the most influental issues for us today. The transportation support people move handily but it has led to the road accidents rate increasing. Hence it can be a serious problem, which should be solved by using applicable solutions. It is possibly said that this issue may be caused by some main factors. First of all, it is worth considering everyone try to hustel regularly. The road will be congested during the rush hours. Instead of giving way for others, many people want to go first. As an evidence, I witnessed an accident when the car attempt to encroach on motorbike’s way. To my way of thinking, not only divide the road between cars and motorbikes but also governments should divide small ways for motorbike. Besides, everyone needs to be responsible for participating in traffic. Another factor leading to this situation is drunk driving. Many people drive vehicles while they are in an alcoholic stupor, leading to loss over control and cause accidents. Base on the research, the percentage of road accidents due to drunk account for 80 percent each year. Aside from drinking alcohol too much can be harmful to your health. Government should implement stringent rules such as breath alcohol concentration tests. In a nutshell, there are many reasons which cause the road accidents but they can be decreased according measures are enlisted imperatively. Our lives may be saved if governments and all of the people are responsible in traffic.
It goes without saying that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
accident
is one of the most
Possible spelling mistake found.
influental
issues for us
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
. The transportation support
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
handily
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it has led to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
accidents
rate increasing.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Hence
it can be a serious problem, which should
be solved
by using applicable solutions.

It is
possibly
said that this issue may
be caused
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
main factors.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, it is worth considering everyone
The pronoun 'everyone' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "tries", "tried".
try
to
Possible spelling mistake found.
hustel
regularly
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
will
be congested
during the rush hours.
Instead
of giving way for others,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
want to go
first
. As an evidence, I witnessed an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
accident
when the car attempt to encroach on motorbike’s way. To my way of thinking, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
divide the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
between cars and motorbikes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
should divide
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
ways for motorbike.
Besides
, everyone needs to be responsible for participating in traffic.

Another factor leading to this situation
is drunk
driving.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
drive vehicles while they are in an alcoholic stupor, leading to loss over control and cause
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
accidents
. Base on the research, the percentage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
accidents
due to drunk account for 80 percent each year. Aside from drinking alcohol too much can be harmful to your health.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
should implement stringent
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
such as breath alcohol concentration
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tests
.

In a nutshell, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
reasons which cause the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
accidents
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they can
be decreased
according measures
are enlisted
imperatively
. Our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
may
be saved
if
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
and
Consider using "all the".
all of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are responsible in traffic.
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IELTS essay Write an essay about road accidents. what's your solutions?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
251 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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