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Write about something you love to do.

Write about something you love to do. 3gEww
One of my favorite activity that I really enjoy spend it in my leisure time or everyday is singing, dancing, and going hang out with my friends. These is common and normal activities like other people, but when I am doing these things, I always be full of happiness. Since I have dreamed about my career path in the future that I want to be an excellent actor who is well-known around the world and have a lot of talents, I for this reason, I strongly love my activities that I do it in everyday. In addition, I always go to my friends’ house to sing many songs with them, but it is not just singing to relax as my friends’ mom are teacher about singing and performing on the stage, so I usually appeal her to teach me what I should to learn or do. Besides singing at my friends’ home, I accompanied with friends at dance studio when it is in holidays to perform and also make this room to have the scent as on real stage. Moreover, going hang out is the best thing that I desire to do due to the fact of the following reasons. First and foremost, when I am doing this with my friends, they entertain me and reduce my stress from bad thing that I face also increasing happiness. Additionally, I like to travel around cities as always, so this is the reason why I love to do this thing the most. In conclusion, these activities, which I like to do, enhance me to has various skills for my occupation in the future even if except going hang out with friends.
One of my favorite
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activity
that I
really
enjoy spend it in my leisure time or
'Everyday' is an adjective. Did you mean "every day"?
everyday
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
singing
, dancing, and going hang out with my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
.
The verb 'is' is singular. Did you mean: "This is" or "These am", "These are", "These aren"?
These is
common and normal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
like other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
when I am doing these things, I
The adverb 'always' is usually put after the verb 'be'.
always be
full of happiness.

Since I have dreamed about my career path in the future that I want to be an excellent actor who is well-known around the world and have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
talents, I
for this reason
, I
strongly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
that I do it in
'Everyday' is an adjective. Did you mean "every day"?
everyday
.
In addition
, I always go to my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends’
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
to sing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
songs with them,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
singing
to relax as my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends’
mom are teacher about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
singing
and performing on the stage,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
I
usually
appeal her to teach me what I should to learn or do.
Besides
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
singing
at my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends’
home, I
The usual collocation for "accompany" is "by," not "with." It is better to say this: "accompanied by".
accompanied with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
at dance studio when it is in holidays to perform and
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
this room to have the scent as on real stage.

Moreover
, going hang out is the best thing that I desire to do due to the fact of the following reasons.
First
and foremost, when I am doing this with my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
, they entertain me and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
thing that I face
also
increasing happiness.
Additionally
, I like to travel around cities as always,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
this is the reason why I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
to do this thing the most.

In conclusion
, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
, which I like to do, enhance me to has various
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
for my occupation in the future even if except going hang out with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
.

IELTS essay Write about something you love to do.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
279 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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