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write a short passage of argument (about 100-200 words) to persuade your friends to go to school by bicycle.

write a short passage of argument (about 100-200 words) to persuade your friends to go to school by bicycle. D2OWW
motorbike is the transportation that is mostly used by students nowadays since it's way faster and more convenient than a bicycle. however, that's the reason why the environment around the world, especially the urban areas, has been polluted severely these past years. even though bicycles may cause you unpredicted troubles when you use them to transport to school, still I think it's a lot better than motorbike. first of all, it's a transportation that is environmental friendly but also helps you go to school faster than go on foot. by transporting by bike, you can help reduce the pollutant that is released by motorbike every day substantially. second, students usually don't have enough time to be active since they're covered up with school schedules and assignments, so riding bike to school is like a sport that will help them exercising, staying fit, and reducing the possibility of obesity. despite all these benefits that riding bike has, it still has some disadvantages. due to its environmental friendly system, it doesn't have any engine, which also means we have to ride it on our feet. therefore, students that live far away are easily being tardy. moreover, if they met any unprecedented accidents like flattened tires on their way to school, they will have to skip that day. in conclusion, although bike has some annoying downsides I strongly believe that it's better to transport to school by it than motorbike since it's the easiest way for us to protect the environment and stay healthy. thus, I highly encourage students to start going to school by bike from now on.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
motorbike
is the transportation
that is
mostly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
nowadays since
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
it's
way faster and more convenient than a bicycle.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
however
, that's the reason why the environment around the world,
especially
the urban areas, has
been polluted
severely
these past years.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
even
though bicycles may cause you
Possible spelling mistake found.
unpredicted
troubles when you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
them to transport to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
,
still
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
it's
a lot better than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
motorbike
.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
first of all
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
it's
a transportation
that is
environmental friendly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
you go to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
faster than go on foot.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
by
transporting by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bike
, you can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the pollutant that
is released
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
motorbike
every day
substantially
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
second
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
usually
don't have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
time to be active since they're covered up with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
schedules and assignments,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
riding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bike
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
is like a sport that will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them
The verb 'sport' is used with an infinitive: "to exercise" or "exercise".
exercising
, staying fit, and reducing the possibility of obesity.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
despite
all these benefits that riding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bike
has, it
still
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
disadvantages.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
due
to its environmental friendly system, it doesn't have any engine, which
also
means we
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
ride it on our feet.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
far away are
easily
being tardy.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
moreover
, if they met any unprecedented accidents like flattened tires on their way to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
, they will
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
skip that day.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
in
conclusion, although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bike
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
annoying downsides I
strongly
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
it's
better to transport to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
by it than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
motorbike
since
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
it's
the easiest way for us to protect the environment and stay healthy.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
thus
, I
highly
encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
going to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bike
from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
on.
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IELTS essay write a short passage of argument (about 100-200 words) to persuade your friends to go to school by bicycle.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
266 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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